Four

4. Silence, Shock and Sadness

Everything happened so fast. The gun's bullets sweeped the edge of my nose and hit the guy who had already finished. Desha and a couple of guys pulled me off him and the only sound i could hear was crying.

Story of my life.

After the whole fiasco, Desha and I ran out to my car and raced the whole way home. She got out of the car, limping whereas I walked out of the car, slowly ambling behind her.

I pull her forcibly by her slutty vest, " What the actual fudge did you actually just put me into?!" She stared emptily into my eyes. But i dont give a shit.

"I was raped just to save you, almost shot at to save you and now-!"

A hand appears in my face, hovering near my nose.

"And you are going to be quiet to save me. Ok little sister?"

"No bitch. It is not my fault that you are an undercover slut. You. Are. A. Slut." Mockery accenting my every words obviously riled up her anger as she struck her fist across my face.

"At least we are both sexually active." She sticks out her tongue and walks away.

You don't understand what that does to me.

I am traumatised  by the fact my no sex before marriage is now over. I can no longer resemble the great women in the Bible.

I am dirty.

I am continously nodding my head saying "Virgin, no, virgin no."

I am stuck in a vicious depressive cycle and nothing and noone can bring me out.

******************

The next day of school arrives and it's Tuesday. Sometimes I think that Tuesday is basically the sideman to Monday who is the main bitch. Sorry for my language but school can do that to a kid.

I have a fight with my snooze alarm resulting in my phone crashing onto my muave carpet floor. Only have fifteen minutes of sleep allows me to have a 30 second shower occupied by tears and silence. I wear basketball shorts with a Hollister jumper and wear my jordans. Jay picks me up.

Oh my dear friend, how am I going to tell you this.

She rolls up in her Red Audi and rolls down the window. I am wearing a grim expression on my face, scared shit about what I am about to say.

"Hey Peaches what's u-"
I interrupt her by slamming the car door behind me.

"Jay, I am no longer a virgin."
"Yass bitch yass you better work," She clapped her hands in a rhythmic pattern while unconsciously twerking in the drivers seat.

"So, Peaches, who is the lucky guy?"

Her once overexcited smile simmered into a thin line of anger, probably by looking at the bruises on my face.

"I was raped." I murmured incoherently.

"What the fuck did you just say?!"

"I. Was. Raped." I stared deeply into her eyes then averted my gaze to the window. Surrounding myself with silence.

We drove up into school and I walked speedily to my locker and Jay ran up behind me with a solemn look on her face.