Do You See Now!

Chapter 33

I realize that it has been so long since I last updated, and for that I am sorry.  I am also sorry to tell you that this book will be ending soon. 

Warning there is mature content implied at the end of this chapter.

Warning some may cry.

Also I apologize for the chapter being so short, the next chapter will be longer, I promise. 

The song used for this chapter is You're the Reason I Come Home, by Ron Pope.

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Sesshomaru and I stopped at night to rest, finding a cave half hidden behind trees, and shrubs scattered around the forest. As I brought Blaze into the cave, Sesshomaru remained out in the trees gathering firewood and catching me something to eat for dinner. While waiting for Sesshomaru's return, I pulled out Blaze's brush from my saddle bag and began to groom my horse, something that I haven't done in what felt like forever, which then made me feel horrible, because I should have been doing this everyday, rather than others doing it for me. I sighed and leaned against him, as I hugged him in a way so to speak. He stomped his front legs and made a noise, telling me he still loves me. "I love you too boy." I told him as I continued to brush him.

I heard someone enter the cave, and I turned to see Sesshomaru, I smiled at him as he began to make the fire for me, and place the rabbit he had gotten for me over the fire. Finishing brushing blaze, I fed him an apple that I always seem to pull out of the saddle bag. Walking over to the far corner of the cave, I closed my eyes and put my arms out. Murmuring, I summoned a bed for Sesshomaru and I to sleep on, and then went to go sit next to my lover. We sat in silence, enjoying each others company while we waiting for my dinner to cook. Once it was done I ate quickly, and drank some water, before we moved to go over to the bed.

As we laid in bed, with my head on Sesshomaru's chest, his arms held me to him. Soon his hold on me tightened. "Rin?"

"Yes?"

"I have kept my promises that you have asked of me, now it is time for me to ask one of you." He seemed almost lost in his thoughts, as if he was making a hard decision, one he didn't really want to make, but yet he must.

"Of course." I moved so that I could face him better, but he wouldn't meet my gaze. That had me worried, what does he want me to promise? "Sesshomaru?" He could hear the worry in my voice, I knew that, but still he didn't meet my gaze.

"You will live, if one of us must die." He looked to me then. "I will die, and you will live and go home to take care of our son." I had never seen him look so defeated, but here he is, falling apart. The great Lord Sesshomaru, had finally found what makes him weak, me and our son. We are his greatest weakness and we will be his death. I hadn't realized that I was crying until he wiped away the tears that fell down my face with his thumb as he began to caress my face. He sat up and I moved to straddle him, his hands moved to hold my waist. "You must do this, do you understand? I will not bare the thought of losing you again."

"Sesshomaru I..."

"I need you to live with our son Rin, he needs his mother."

"And he needs his father. Sesshomaru I can't lose you." A sob shook my body, and his grip tighten, his jaw clenched, and his eyes never left mine.

"You must survive for him, for me. It is my job to protect my family." His hands went back to cup my face. "Live, Rin. My love, my mate, live." One silent tear left his eyes, and he pulled me towards him and kissed me as if he would never get the chance again. As if he were dying already and he needed me to survive. I was his air he breathed, and the reason for his very existence.

"I love you Sesshomaru." Tears fell down my cheeks, and a few fell on his arms, sobs shook my body, and my voice broke full of emotion. "Will you make me one last promise? I had to ask, I needed this, and so did he.

"Anything."

"Love me." My voice was shaky, and breaking from the pain and sadness that overpowered me. "Love me, one last time?" I had to ask, I needed him one last time. I needed this to always remember the love of my life. "I need you one last time. Love me?"

His lips met mine, and it was as if we were loving each other for the first time once more. He held me in his arms as he loved me one last time. That night would forever be imbedded into my memory, and my body. How he looked at me, how he caressed me. How we loved...