"What the hell was that? I get that you're new here but find some other puppet to laugh and mock because I'm not interested! So take your sick jokes somewhere else, fascinate the jocks with them or something. I don't care what you do, but leave me alone!" He takes a step back, shock on his face. It's the most I've said to him, but it's worth it to show the emotion and have him leave me alone. Only, he isn't going, he's still standing there.
"Is that really what you think?" He asks softly and a flicker of doubt enter my mind. I send it away, I won't give in to his mind games.
"You're not fooling me, so stop pretending to care, stop trying to be my friend and stop buzzing around me." My voice is rising again and I have to be careful in trying to control it. "I'm not pretending." He says, putting a false sad note into his voice and gazing at me with puppy eyes. I don't care, I won't give in to his sadistic games. "Just go, please." I ask him and hear his footsteps walk away slowly.
"Hey, it's the wrist cutter." A loud mocking tone sang out and I sigh, hearing the resounding laughter. "What's wrong, did your little friend realise what a freak you are?" I don't answer Brian's rhetorical question. he seems to have forgotten that I'm the one that walked out. "You know he doesn't really care about you? He's laughing at what a pathetic weirdo you are, he told me himself." It hurts more than I care to admit to have my suspicions confirmed. Which is stupid, I've only known the guy five minutes.
"You entertained him for a bit, but I think he's getting bored with you. He'll be sitting with us next time, you'll see." He brushes past me, knocking me over and the still chuckling audience follows him. "Skank." Collene, head of the cheerleading squad and the female version of Brian comments on her way past. The jock and the cheerleader, so cliche it makes me want to barf. She and Brian are perfect for each other, soul mates so to speak. Ten years in the future I see them bringing their little devil children to school, probably already having learnt Bullying 101.
Sick of the lack of control, I duck my head and hurry to the girls bathroom. Digging in my pocket, I retrieve my razor and lock myself in a stall. I cut away the stupid hurt and pointless betrayal echoing inside me, watching my blood drip into the toilet. Red dye streaking the water. My emotions fade, I am once again in the numbing abyss I know I can rely on. Wrapping the bandage around my arm to staunch the flow of blood I sigh deeply, locking the latest experience away in a compartment where I can't think about it anymore. When I walk out of the bathroom nobody notices anything different and I carry on as usual.
Despite myself, my stomach grows tighter as lunchtime approaches, my intestines twisted and bunched. I walk into the cafeteria cautiously and the sight is just as Brian promised. There's the table of jocks and cheerleaders, laughing and messing around. And fitting right in with them is Ben, a perfect piece in the jock squad. An involuntary gasp slips out of me. Almost as if he heard it he looks up and locks his gaze on me. For a moment we stare at each other, then I spin on my heel and march out, no-one else noticing. This time he doesn't come after me.
He tries whispering to me in Maths, the last period before home time, but today I am completely focused on what Mr. Neegle has to say. Rather, I pretend to be. He catches up to me at the school gate, determined to spout excuses.
"Just, listen to me." He says, touching my arm and, unbeknownst to him, my scars. I don't flinch, just turn away. I'm sick of the drama. He should've signed up for the dramatic arts, where people might actually care. "It wasn't my idea to sit there, I swear. Brian said we could come to some kind of arrangement, I'd do something for him and he'd lay off you." Oh right, so he went there with my best interests at heart. Ha, he must think I'm completely stupid. "You have to believe me. I tried talking to him, but he just kept talking and laughing. When I saw you leave the cafeteria, I wanted to go after you. But I wanted to help, I wanted to get him off your back. Please, Reegan."
"I don't need some pretty boy acting like a knight to save me. Everything's just dandy. So take your prancing pony and go to hell." My voice is as expressionless as before we met and he picks up on it, even though he doesn't know why it's wrong. He falls back and I think I've finally got him to leave. But then he grabs my arm again and pulls me off the path. This time I can't help the grimace, but he doesn't see it. "I hear what everyone says about you. I think it's sick. When I see what they do to you it makes me so mad. I do care about you, Reegan. What can I do to make you see that?" Quite a pretty speech from a pretty guy. Too bad everything that good is always too good to be true.
"You've known me two days. You can't do anything." I say, trying to make my voice as cold as possible. He'd have to be deaf not to understand.
"I see the hurt inside you, I want to help, to be your friend." He sounds sincere, if he's lying he's quite an actor. Instincts are one of the only things I have, but eventually even they can betray you. I can't trust anyone. My phone vibrates and I look down to see an angry txt from Mum. "I've got to go." I brush him off and hurry down the path. "Please give me a chance." He says, but I don't look back.
A/N Now that you have a feel for what the book will be like, let me know if you like it.
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The reason
Teen FictionReegan, a 16 year old girl is struggling to deal with a mother who turned abusive shortly after her younger brother, Ben, died from leukaemia. Her dad walked out on them and she never really knew her grandparents, let alone how to contact them. At s...
