Do You Love Me? (A Phan Fiction)

10

PHIL P.O.V

I got the keys out of my pocket and removed my arms from Dan's shoulders. They made a clink noise as i turned the key. slot. Dan opened up the door and I walked in first. Dan followed me up the stairs and closed the door.

It was now pitch black. I took my phone out for light so i could see the steps. The only noise was our feet against the stairs and the sound of keys.

Once i reached the flat surfaced floor when the flight of stairs ended, i openerd the other door. I walked in but i didnt hear the other footsteps behind me. I turned on the light switch to the first room in the apartment so we could see and looked out the door way to the stairs. Dan was in the 3rd step from the top still.

"Phil...what...um...there's something i need to tell you.." He sounded nervous and worried, but almost excited.

Anxiety pricked at my stomach,"Dan...is it bad?What is it?"

"I dont know...if i really want to tell you. Its not bad...unless you think its bad." He looked down.

I felt like giving him a hugging,"Its okay. You can tell me anything you want. Come inside."

Mumbling,"P-Phil, could you sit down right here with me...on the steps?I would just like it better."Dan nervously rubbed the back of his neck.

I was really scared of what he had to say now. Why couldn't he come in the apartment and tell me? Did he kill a person? Is he gonna move out? Did his mum die?

"Okay." I walked over to the stairs.

As i took my first step on the first stair down, I saw Dan suddenly move fastly. I felt his lips collide with mine. My body told me to break the kiss, but my brain told me kiss back. Instict made me kiss back and wrap my arm around Dan's waist. My body was in shock. Was this really happening?! Is Daniel James Howell kissing me? There was no tounge. It was a quick,soft 4 second kiss.

I felt Dan's arm move up to my neck. He moved down a step and broke the kiss. We both breathed. I didn't know what to stay.

We stood there for about 2 seconds in silence on the stairs. I stood two steps up. It made me tower over Dan. From the light, I could see tears from Dan's eyes.

"Da-"I started to say

"I'm so sorry Phil." Dan ran around me and into the apartment.

I blinked as my brain put the puzzle pieces together of what was happening,"Dan wait!" I speed walked into the apartment. I heard the door slamming of Dan's bedroom door.

I went over to his room and leaned my head against the door,"Dan. Dan are you okay? Its okay."

He didnt answer.

I felt tears come to my eyes. I didn't know what to do or think. What just happened? Dan Howell just kissed me....my best friend...that i have always loved.....and i kissed back..
Because i wanted to...Because i liked him. The first second of the kiss was a bit rough, since i didn't know what was going on. But the next 3 seconds...it was a soft kind kiss. Dan's lip showed love.

I heard Dan sobbing. I wanted to hug him...so badly.

I felt a cold tear run down my cheek. I loved Danisnotonfire. I really did. It's time i started to man up and stop blocking it. Stop blocking my feelings. Realise that its okay to feel this way. Show your true feelings. Embrace them.

The words came out of my mouth,"Dan....Dan i love you." My voice cracked from the crying. I heard Dans sobs quiet down,"Dan i loved you ever since the first time we met in person back in 2009. I'm sorry. I've been blocking my feelings for you. I was afraid...and i don't even know of what. Maybe that if i told you...you wouldnt feel the same or that you would leave me. I need you Dan...and i want you. I want to spend my life by your side and i don't want anything to get between us. And if for some reason this isn't how you feel...i perfectly understand. Dan...open the door...please." It was difficult to talk when my voice kept cracking.

AUTHORS NOTE
Sorry if i didn't make the kiss very intense or exciting or whatever. I haven't had ma first kiss yet sooooo....