Brilliant Bones

Shelter

Nicole

Conner and I left the gas station soon after I danced with him. He drove me home and we agreed that he'd come to my house on Tuesday to start the project.
My moms were surprised I was home so early, but I told them the lie (I'm not a casual liar, but I knew how much I'd regret telling the truth) that I had built up on the way home; that the movie times had been mixed up so Brie and I went to Central Starbucks.
As we talk about Brie, I'll mention that she called the next morning to tell me that her and Sid kissed last night and had sex. I acted like I cared but I really didn't, even if Brie had just lost her virginity.
I don't why so many people find it so hard to believe, but I'm a virgin. I hate that everyone assumes that Wade and I had sex whilst we were together. He wanted sex but I refused. I know it pissed him off , but I didn't care but unlike other girls, I respect my body.
I suddenly became pissed off with Brie for basically trying to use Conner as a babysitter for me  so she could sleep with Sid. I eventually spent most of my weekend in my room; doing homework, studying for the history test coming up and watching  Mad Men marathons because I just felt I could. It's not like I didn't leave the house the whole weekend, I actually spent a lot of time with my family when I wasn't pondering on Mad Men. All four of us: Mom, Ma , Gabrielle and I did some shopping and lunch in Southern Preasly on Sunday afternoon.I'll never reject going out with my family. I know I sometimes feel like literally putting a knife through Gabrielle's heart, but I would never ever actually do it. I love Gabrielle, she's my little, gorgeous -yet difficult- sister. I would honestly sacrifice myself to save her life. I had a tremendous time with them. Ma and Mom wanted to go look at some new furniture store so Gabrielle just went to go and try on clothes at Urban Outfitters . We tried on clothes that we wanted as well as the most hideous clothes we could find just so we could take stupid pictures of each other. We especially tried on all the crop tops (we called it 'the slut tops' because we've just been raised to be conservative) that basically only covered our breasts. After trying a few on a few and looking at myself in the mirror, I remembered that only two weeks ago I had been grasped to the idea that I was fat...but I actually looked much healthier than I had been looking at the beginning of the year. I had been barely  eating at the beginning of the year and was probably on the edge of reaching an anorexic diagnosis. My stomach was now flattish. It wasn't  as flat as it had been before -but it looked much more healthy and fresh. My thighs weren't skinny like they were before but had some fat hollowing around my bone, but I looked like a normal human bean.
After examining myself in the changing room mirror, I heard a knock on the stall door and received a shocked jump. I heard myself release a slight gasp and my eyes were wondering all over the place.
"It's just me". Gabrielle said.
I exhaled some air and turned my body to face the door. I was still in my bra and underwear , waiting for my sister to bring something ridiculous or beautiful for me to try on.
"Um, yeah". I said as I exhaled.
"Mom and Ma want us to meet them at the grocery store in ten minutes, so I want us to try one last thing on".
"What do you want me to try on"? I asked.
As Gabrielle talked to me on the other side of the door, I kept on staring at my half naked body in the mirror. I was trying to figure out whether I liked what I was looking at or if I preferred looking like a skeleton.
"A dress".
I cringed at myself in the mirror.
"They don't have dresses here".
"I'm not talking about a party dress".
"Then what sort of dress"?
"A sun dress".
I looked at my feet, size five and all.
"Are you trying one on"?
"Yeah".
I shook my head slightly.
"Elle, we're going into autumn-it's already autumn!"
"Who said we're buying them"?
I sighed. I opened the door slightly to make sure my hand could get through but my body was hidden.  Gabrielle placed the clothes hanger in my left hand and I pulled my arm backward into the stall. I locked the stall again before actually looking at the outfit.
It didn't look like a sun dress, but it was made for the summer. It was black-completely black- and long, measured to reach my feet. With material and loose spaghetti straps, I could see that I would have to wear a strapless bra with it. The body of the dress was loose yet it had a shape , it wasn't just curve less. I took the dress from the bottom and dressed it on my body by putting it over my head. It fell so swiftly onto by body and adapted my shape. I looked at myself in the mirror.
I felt...pretty. That's how I felt. I felt like that if I were to walk into Pens Park with this dress on, a thousand eyes would be on me. I saw myself smile, and I didn't let it fade. With the smile still on my face, I unlocked the stall door and stepped outside.
Gabrielle stood outside the stall, wearing the same exact dress as me. I could see she had gotten a smaller size to fit her tiny, petite frame.
I still have a feeling that before her sixteenth birthday that she may grow an inch or two. She just looks so much like Ma that it makes me have an idea that she'll grow to be five ft five like her. The dress looked pretty on her...but there was something missing.
"Wow", she said as I stepped out, "you look...gorgeous".
The smile that I had embraced in the changing room was still on my face.
"Thanks". I said, twirling around.
"How do I look"? She asked.
I shrugged as I held the fabric of the dress in my hand and spun around like a Disney princess, I tried to figure out a way  to say in the best way possible that the dress just didn't suit my sister. It caused  a great silence.
"It's fine", she finally said, "I don't really like it on myself that much".
I then dropped the fabric of the dress and took eye contact into account with my sister.
"Don't worry", I said, "I'll help you find something to suit you".
She gaped.
"You're going to buy the dress, aren't you"?