Lone [MATURE HS]

Chapter 10.

n. took me forever to get back on the writing boat. and i apologize for that. my inconsistency is a habit i'm trying to break.

I look at him, my eyes squinting faintly at the side of his face. "What kind of information...?" I ask quietly. "On a person...?" My desire to know makes me seem intrusive and nosy. I try not to act like I care, but for some idiotic reason (my feelings), I do. Too interested.

Harry exhales loudly through his nose, a habit he does a lot when he's tense. I take notice of his loose grip on the steering wheel, shoulders dropping a little. "It's uh...about my parents' case."

There is silence present. Radiant and clear. I furrow my eyebrows. A sensitive topic like that, I wasn't ready or important enough to make statements in. Important enough to him; I wasn't important enough to him, I felt, to have an opinion. I press my lips together, turn my head to the window and stare at the foggy dimness from outside.

I hear him take another breath before he mutters, "It was stupid. I thought I was getting somewhere. I...I didn't believe that both of my parents dying in fires at my house...spontaneous fires...it doesn't make sense -- it just doesn't." He's stammering, a hint of desperation to be understood and to explain himself. Rambling. "B-But everyt-time I'd get led to school records or police records. I stopped, now, though. I have to accept it, I guess? I mean -- it drives me nuts and I can't really sleep---"

The car stops at a red light. I look at him just as he looks at me. He stopped himself from talking, watching my face and trying to distinguish whether I understood what he's trying to say or if I'm completely, utterly lost. I open my mouth to say something, but nothing really happens. Parted lips and furrowed eyebrows, I stare him down the way he does to me. I'm not lost, just....a little surprised, but I can't say that's new with him.

The light turns green. "I'm not bothering to look for answers. My aunt thinks I'm nuts and I need to go to therapy, so I just stopped telling people there," he confesses. "It's just...years apart, same location --"

"Hey," I call softly, trying to get him to stop talking for just a minute so he can relax. "You're not nuts. If it was me in that position, I'd be thinking and doing the same things. Only difference is that I'm not in that position...so I don't think I should even have an opinion about what you tried doing."

"Tara--"

"No, I just...it's a federal offense. But, you know...some things are important and worth it. That's all I'm gonna say," I respond quietly. "And also that I'm angry. Because...the more I get to know you, the more I'm convinced that you really, really didn't deserve anything that happened to you. It...it--"

"Sucks," he finishes for me. "Maybe I did, though -- maybe I deserved it. I must've done something."

"No you didn't," I firmly state. "I highly doubt that."

"You think that because you like me."

I clench my jaw. "No...I don't go blind the second some...some super sweet, hot baseball player with curly hair and green eyes and a cute dimple on his left cheek when he smiles comes around...with his dumb corny compliments and sexy...sexy," I whisper to myself, "sexy...voice."

Harry glances at me, face contorting to one of slight amusement. His lips curve at the corners slightly, furrowed eyebrows raising slightly. And my voice goes soft. "I can't let myself go blind. That'd be stupid of me. I would just be giving him all the power...which is dumb because...I like power. Lots and lots of it."