Remember Me //[Sequel to Promise Me] Completed [✔️]

oh baby

Tegan's P.O.V
March 2015

~~~
Dear me,

Yesterday, I spent the whole afternoon searching for baby names. I had covered a page of my notebook in names. I was bouncing with excitement while Pen and Liam were at an ultrasound. It took me hours of searching, but I finally decided on, drum roll please:

Lexie Alexandra Payne

Dylan Tyler Payne

I felt like a genius!

Pen is about six months along in her pregnancy. That's not much longer before I become Aunt Tink! I was bouncing with excitement until there was a knock on my door. Louis peaked his head in. He looked discouraged, but when I asked how he was doing, he ignored me, sitting down at the desk beside me. He picked up my notebook and asked, "what's this?"

I watched his eyebrows slightly knit together as he starred at the list. I asked him, "what do you think of the last two?" His lips curved down before he mumbled, "Oh, Tegan, come here."

I crawled into his lap and he wrapped his arms around me. My head rested against his chest. This is how we were situated when he told me that Liam had just rang, the ultrasound wasn't good.

The little girl was gone.

My little sister was gone.

In a single second, everything had changed.

Louis was emotional. He shared how Liam had been dragging him to baby stores, giddy, grabbing Louis' shoulder tenderly and whispering, "a father of two, the best way to start!"

Eleanor came in to tell us when they arrived and I was left alone.

"Just stay here," Louis had patted my back.

Why wasn't I welcome? I thought we were past this, shutting each other out. I know I shouldn't have been angry, but I was. I curled up in bed, my knees pulled to my chest.

How could something like this happen to Liam and Penelope, I wondered. I remembered Liam was busy when Pen went to an ultrasound once, so I went with her. That was the ultrasound she found out she was having twins. It was supposed to just be the gender reveal, Liam was so upset he couldn't go, Niall told me he cried.

I had felt so sad when Niall told me that, I found Liam immediately and gave me a hug. When he asked, "what'd you do that for?"

I lied, "No reason."

Liam always held himself together around me. I thought I didn't have a problem with it, but now I can't help but feel isolated. Like I am always one foot in, one foot out. I don't get to be there for every part of their lives, but they are there for every part of mine.

I had to snap myself out of those thoughts. My anger was misplaced, I assured myself. It was hard for me believe my thoughts were a lie as the clock ticked. When Louis and Eleanor had left, I assumed it wouldn't be long. Over an hour had gone by.

I remembered after the ultrasound I went to with Pen we went to the store and bought a bucket of pink paint and blue paint. We painted one of her hands pink, and the other blue. Then pressed her hands in a heart shape on her white t-shirt. Later that day, when Liam came home, she was wearing it. He dropped his backpack, running to her, kissing all over her face, then gasping, "twins?"

I cried while thinking of this and that is finally when someone came in. Course, Liam had to find me crying. We hugged and he cried. He cried, mumbling, "I feel like we did something wrong, or we deserved this."

We cried for a bit. Louis had told him about the names, so I showed him. He liked the name Dylan, "but we have to ask Penny," he said. I pulled his arm toward the door, excitedly.

In the living area between the bedrooms, Penelope was sitting between Eleanor and Perrie.

Pen's face was puffy and red, but her eyes were dry.

I offered her the name, "Dylan Tyler Payne."

After that, her face scrunched up and I almost crumbled to the ground. Everything fell back into place when Penelope explained that she wanted to used James as the middle name. Liam's eyes lit up and they agreed, their love radiating.

Penelope and Liam showered me with love, how they can't wait for their son to have the best "Aunt Tink" ever. My heart was full, and I went to bed with a smile on my face.

I lost a little sister, but I still had five amazing brothers.

- TJSM

~~~

love = a form of amnesia when a girl forgets that there are a billion other boys in the world

I feel like it's all about him. it's all about my guy BFF; C.

wtf is wrong with me

I can't be in love with him

I'm not in love with him

there's no way!

because I'm already Tyson Malik

edited: 10.27.24