Depression. (Pt. I.)

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a/n: unedited, please excuse the errors.

warning! this chapter includes the subject of suicide, if you do not feel comfortable with it, please skip.

Summary: in where Jade is depressed and gives in.


High school.

Two words that pretty much sums it all up. Jade could go on and on about how it sucks to be picked on, but this time, she's had enough. She's so tired of it all. She just wants to end all of it, yet can't find the courage to leave her Perrie.

Oh, Perrie, sweet innocent Perrie. The only good thing that's ever happened to her was Perrie.

Jade met her on the first day of school, she was by her locker (that already has the word fag written across it), earphones plugged in, listening to My Chemical Romance on full blast, breathing in and out. When suddenly, a small pale blonde girl passed by, full of smiles, greeting everyone even though no one knew her yet.

It was highly unlikely for this girl to see Jade, nor acknowledge her by the way the she was making friends, yet she turned around and saw Jade, big blue eyes piecing through Jade's dark brown ones.

The girl made her way through Jade and said, "Hello."

Eyebrows raised, she replied with a rude, "What?"

"I'm Perrie." Blondie said, a sweet smile gracing her features, making Jade stop and gaze for a moment.

She hesitated before saying, "Jade."

Now, in Perrie's eyes, what she saw was a beautiful girl with blue hair, eyes that are so doe-like, it almost made her melt into a puddle. But she could tell there was something wrong too, like she didn't want to be here.

"I like your hair." Perrie said, wanting to slap herself at how stupid she was at trying to make conversation.

"Thanks." Jade replied curtly.

Since then, Perrie kept on talking to Jade til they became friends, which lead on to Jade saying she liked Perrie, they kissed, dated and now, the year was almost over, and Jade feels like shit all over again.

You see, there were days where Jade was...hit by everything in life and couldn't handle it. Perrie would always be there, of course, but this time, she wasn't and that was what Jade really needed right now.

Usually when these happened, Jade would cry herself in the bathroom, with Perrie banging on the door til she managed to open it.

Perrie, then, would scoop Jade up her arms, hugging her, saying, "Bubba, I'm here. Baby, please don't do this to yourself. Don't listen to them, please."

But, the thing was, Perrie's not here.

And as she stared at her own reflection in the mirror, thoughts crawled up her head, making her feel dizzy. Ugly, depressed, fat, useless, freak, not worth it, fag, she's had enough. She wants out. She should've done this earlier.

The only regret of her is leaving Pez. Her beautiful Perrie would be alone, but it'd be alright. She's find another girl and be happy with someone else. Jade would find peace, and that's all she wants really.

But, she'd leave Pez a letter. Just for closure, Jade thought as she finished writing the letter and slowly drowned herself in the bath as the darkness found it's way and grasped her down to what she wanted, peace.

To be continued.

Jerrie (Oneshots)Where stories live. Discover now