Mente Sonum

Chapter 10

Emma had felt nauseous for days, keeping the negative news from Regina. They were sitting in the doctors office, waiting on Raider to come and tell them what was seen on the CT scan.

The technician hadn't explained any further so Emma was, in a way, in the dark. All she knew was it couldn't have been good.

Raider immediately tried to kick her out but Regina quickly shot that down.

"She stays. I want her to stay."

"But--"

"She's all I have. I need her to stay."

Emma wanted to cry, like a blubbering, red eyes kind of cry. She had been holding it in for days, thinking maybe it wasn't anything too bad, even though it felt like she had rocks on her chest. And apart from that, Emma realized how alone her love was. No one visited her. She had no loved ones, beside Emma of course. After debunking the fairytale thing, she realized that Regina was mostly likely lost or never had a family to begin with. There had to be someone looking for her, right?

There was no way to check though. Whenever they had asked the brunette for a last name, she'd struggle for several minutes before giving up. She couldn't remember her own last name. Maybe that should've been another warning.

Raider sighed, bringing Emma's attention back to him.

"I looked over the CT scans. Regina, you have something called an intraventricular tumor."

"What?" Emma's eyes screwed shut at Regina's shaky question, the brunette already on the verge of sobbing.

"Within the brain there are several ventricles that are filled with cerebrospinal fluid. You have a tumor on one of your ventricles. This tumor has been causing your headaches and... and your delusions. Mental instability, hallucinations, and delusions can be symptoms of this."

"Delusions? I-I don't..."

Raider looked at Emma pleadingly. The blonde wiped at her eyes and cleared her throat, "Sweetheart, you're not The Evil Queen and I'm not The Savior. You have a tumor that's making you believe these things."

"But I... I am!"

Emma shook her head patiently, "No, my love, it's all a story you read. My son, Henry, is reading the same book."

"Our son."

"Maybe one day, he'll be ours. But he doesn't know you yet. I want you to know him, for you two to love each other like I love the both of you."

"I want that too."

"So let's figure out how to fix this, okay? So that you can get out of this asylum and we can be a family, me and you and Henry." Emma tucked chestnut hair behind a small ear. Regina grabbed her hand and pressed her cheek against the palm, giving the sensitive skin a kiss.

"Okay." Emma wanted to break down.

"I promise I won't leave your side. This isn't your problem. This is our problem. I'll be here every step of the way, okay?"

Regina nodded, tears rolling down her cheeks steadily as small hiccups rose from her lungs. Emma was barely keeping herself together. Her eyes were burning, her nose was running, and her heart was breaking.

She turned to Raider, "So what do we do?"

"Well, the tumor isn't large so we'll go in and remove it surgically then biopsy it to see the following course of action. If it's not malignant and we're able to remove it completely, that'll be all. If it's malignant, we're looking at chemo or radiation. But let's take this one step at a time. So, do I schedule the surgery?"

Regina nodded, her eyes glazed over. Raider's lips lifted forlornly, his eyes showing just how sorry he felt for Regina.

"I'll schedule it for as soon as possible. My friend will perform the surgery. She's very good. Plus, I'll scrub in and make sure everything goes smoothly."

"Thank you, Raider."

"Of course. For what it's worth, I'm wishing you the best, the both of you."

The two women nodded their thanks and the doctor stood, leaving the room promptly to give them some alone time.

The moment the door shut Regina threw herself into Emma's arms. The blonde immediately wrapped her arms tightly around the other woman. Emma kissed the temple her lips were resting on.

"I'm so scared, for so many reasons."

"Talk to me."

"I don't know what's real and what's not. I'm so confused. You're both telling me my memories aren't real. And I'm afraid of what could happen. What if it's malignant and I have to have chemo? What if I lose my hair and lose weight and you don't find me attractive anymore?"

"Impossible. You could shave your head and wear a garbage bag and I'd still want you. I'll always want you, Regina."

"What if I wake up from surgery and I'm different? What if you don't love the person I apparently am?"

"Regina, you're snarky and smart and you call me out on my shit. You make me smile just by being near me. You make me laugh harder than anyone else can. You make me happy. So if you're a bit different, it'll only be for the better, if possible, in my eyes."

"I..."

"I want you to be healthy, no matter what that means. I want you to be free. I have faith that we'll survive this. Do you?"

Regina smiled softly, "I'll try to have faith."

"That's all I ask."