HE NEVER SAYS.

iv.

yoongi meets a new boy that causes his world to tilt on its axis. his name is hoseok, he has a pretty smile and bright eyes, and when he kisses yoongi, yoongi doesn't feel so guilty about kissing him back.

"i think jimin likes you," hoseok whispers as yoongi comes back from grabbing a drink in the kitchen. he's bought a water bottle for himself and hoseok, but jimin gets a can of black drink instead. his eyes were bright as he thanked the older boy, his fingers curling around yoongi's. right now, he's too busy shooting at buttons on a controller to notice that hoseok and yoongi are talking about him.

"likes me?" yoongi asks. he sits back on the couch, his eyes falling to jimin. "nah," yoongi says as jimin turns around, almost as if sensing that yoongi is staring at him. his lips raise into a wide grin, his eyes shining, but then he glances at hoseok, quickly turning back to the game with a frown. "he doesn't like me." he loves me.

"hmm," hoseok hums, taking a drink of water. "it sure looks like it sometimes." hoseok frowns. "i just don't want to get in the way of anything here."

yoongi grins, his fingers playing with the hair at the nape of hoseok's neck. he leans forward, quickly pecking hoseok on the lips. "there's nothing. me and jimin aren't anything."

and hoseok smiles, cuddling into yoongi's side, and he doesn't even know that yoongi is lying, just a little bit.

"are you ashamed of us, hyung?" jimin asks as soon as hoseok leaves.

yoongi looks up in surprise. "ashamed of what?"

"ashamed of us," jimin repeats. he frowns, "or i mean, ashamed of what we had?"

yoongi finds himself scowling, shaking his head as he starts to pick up the mess that was created. "don't read too much into things jimin. you know what we had. don't make it something it wasn't."

jimin narrows his eyes. yoongi notices that jimin has been looking sick lately, his face thinning out more and more. there's two dark circles around his eyes, making his face appear to be sinking in. "i could tell hoseok."

yoongi shrugs, cleaning the table. "then tell him."

"what does he have that i don't?"

yoongi sighs, setting an empty bottle down. "jimin," he warns, "drop it."

"no," jimin pushes. he comes to stand next to yoongi. "what's so great about him, huh? i thought you didn't do relationships, so why him? huh, hyung? what does he have?"

"because he's good and pure and nice and he's everything i'm not," yoongi says forcefully. "now, drop it."

jimin blinks back, physically coiling away from yoongi. his fingers run over his thin and delicate wrist, his eyes lost. "i was good and pure too."

yoongi feels that guilt close up on his throat. "jimin, that's not what i mean–"

jimin looks up, his smile sad. "it's true. i was." he sighs, shaking his head. "i still love you hyung, you know that right?"

yoongi swallows harshly. "i know."

jimin closes his eyes, his fingers circling around his own wrist. "when did things get so complicated?"

he wants to reach out to jimin, but he's not sure how to do it without burning the poor boy. "i don't know."