Star Wars EU Ships and One-Shots

Carry Me Home

  Leia's initial shock had slowly faded as the day had died down. Ben's cries had washed out the sound of her own sniffling and she'd found a source of comfort in her own husband. Once they'd gotten Ben to fall asleep and laid him down, Leia had nestled into Han, without a word. Surprised, Han had smiled faintly down at her, moving his arms to wrap around her. They'd stayed like that, snuggled in each other's arms, for a while. Leia had no idea how long, just that it helped to numb the pain and she didn't want to leave Han's side.
  She was sure she had been crying, too, but none if that mattered. She was lost in her thoughts, lost to the world. Han was the only thing she was conscious of. Her thoughts refused to turn away from her lost son, her dear, precious, baby boy. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't forget it, couldn't shake her thoughts from what it had felt like to feel him so suddenly ripped from her, ripped from life. Everything had been fine. She'd been discussing something(she couldn't even remember what) with Chief of State Borsk Fey'lya when, out of nowhere . . .
  Leia had felt a persistent pain in her side, a lingering pain that refused to leave. She remembered touching her hand to the spot, wondering what it was exactly that she was feeling. Then, just like that, he was gone. She'd gasped, realizing what she'd just felt. For a nanosecond, Anakin had been blazing in the Force like a brilliant, furious, burning flame then, abruptly extinguished. Gone. Dead. No longer. She'd made no more noise for a moment. Faintly, she had heard Chief Fey'lya asking if she was alright and what was going on. Leia had hardly even perceived the words. Everything else was lost to her. Finally, the full impact hit her and she screamed, howled, sobbing as she begged the Force for it not to be true. Memories came like a flood and, with stunning, evil clarity, she could recall every time she'd ever had to part with him, her baby. Her youngest. Her precious.

  She'd pounded on the floor, screaming as loud as she could, screeching and letting loose every awful noise she could make. She remembered Han rushing in, hurrying to her side and trying to figure out what had happened. And all that she'd managed to get out was, "A-a-an-aaaaaaaaaaahhhgg!"
  And Han knew.

  Now, here she was, trying to forget it, trying to ignore the spacious hole in her heart, clinging to Han for support. She felt Han move and her eyes fluttered open. She hadn't even realized she was drifting off to sleep. "Alright, it's bedtime," Han said, leaning over her and carefully picking her up into his arms. "No," she muttered, burying her head in his chest. "I can't . . . try."

  "I know," Han kissed her head and brought her to their room. "We don't have to." He laid her in bed and laid down next to her, pulling the blankets over their bodies. "We can just lie here. That's all we need to do. Can you do that for me?"

  Leia nestled closer to Han, closed her eyes.

  "Good. There we go."

  "Han?"
  "Yeah, Princess?"

  "Just stay with me. Forever. Let's never move again. Never leave me again."

  "I like that idea." He kissed her again and pulled the blankets over her shoulders. "I'll never leave you again."