Misalignment | ✔

truth

It seems like
a lifetime
since Matty has last
sat with me
at lunch.
In her absence,
only Seth has filled
the silence,
stopping by just to make
pathetically obscene comments
that honestly seem
rather forced,
and to fire off
tasteless insults
that do more to
annoy me
than hurt me.

Well,
they wouldn't hurt me -
except that Matty
has probably heard
what they're saying
about me
by now,
as they're not exactly
discreet
about it.
Their opinions
don't matter,
but Matty's does -
and since I don't know
for sure
what that is right now...

"You're just
a waste of space,"
Seth laughs today
as he walks past
my lunch table -
the one that
Matty and I
usually share -
trailed by his
gang of ne'er-do-wells.
"I mean, look -
you're taking up
a whole table
yourself."

It's not my fault
that no one else wants
to sit anywhere
near me,
or that
Matty
is nowhere to be found.
More than anything,
I wish I could
give Seth
a taste of his
own medicine -
but he's too
far away now
to hear anything I
might say.

I'm still
brooding
on that
when the
cafeteria door
suddenly opens,
admitting a familiar
mestizo brunette
into the room -
and it's like
my eyes are
immediately
drawn to the spot,
even though
no one else
seems to have noticed
her appearance.

She looks
just the same
as she has
nearly every day for
the past few weeks:
despondent
and careworn,
with eyes rimmed
in red from
sleeplessness -
I can tell that
even from
across the room.

I'm suddenly struck
with a strange sensation
of longing -
longing for
her presence
in my life,
for her
encouraging smiles
and happy laughs
and doubtless optimism.
I miss her;
more than that,
though,
I miss the way
she used to be,
before all the
tragedies
and hardships
that have seemed
to pile
upon
the both of us
all at once.

I miss everything -
and I can't
take it
any more.
I can't just
sit by
and watch her
edge out of my life.

So my reaction
is immediate.
She doesn't see me
before I reach her side,
abandoning my lunch
and backpack
at my table.
But I don't care -
let Seth and his lot
tamper with it
if they so desire.
Their shenanigans are
insignificant
in the face of
this moment,
this attempt to
win back
my best friend.

Matty has no time
to run away now -
so I'm given a
perfect view of her
shocked face
as she finally
lays eyes on me.
"C-Cam?"
she splutters.
"Uh, hi-"

"You've been
avoiding me,"
I state
in a voice much
calmer
than how I
currently feel.
"What's going on?"

"N-no,
no I haven't -
I just-"

"You haven't been
answering my texts,
and you haven't spoken
so much as
a single word
to me
in at least a week.
If that's not
avoiding me,
then please,
Matty,
tell me what is."

My tone rises
at the end,
making her flinch.
I should feel
guilty,
but I don't.
She deserves
to know how
I feel.
From what little
I know,
that's how friendships
work.
That's how you
resolve conflict:
clear communication.

But the truth hurts -
I should know that
by now.

×

Cliffhanger ?? Sort of. More like crappy break in the scene. But I had to split it in two parts because it's way too long otherwise. Also drawing out the drama stuff is coooooool.

If you guys liked this chapter, I would love if you would vote and leave me some feedback below! It would be much appreciated! (Also, thanks for getting this to 2K reads, guys!! I'm so glad that so many people like this; I've gotten a lot of positive feedback since I first started this project, and I'm just really happy that the message of this story is being spread. Agender and other non-binary genders really need more recognition, honestly.)