Chase Solus And The Prophecy

1) My Gym Rope Randomly Combusts Into Flames

Let me be perfectly clear when I tell you that none of this was my fault.

How could it be honestly? One second I'm staring at a rope I inevitably have to climb, trying to find a way to do it without looking like an idiot in front of everybody and the next thing I know my school is on fire.

Okay, I'll admit I'm leaving out some stuff in the middle but I don't think it's that important. I'm pretty sure it was a dream anyway. Nothing that weird can actually happen in real life.

Okay, this is the part where you roll your eyes and put this book down. I wouldn't blame you. I mean, you probably think that I'm a kid who is somehow different from everybody else. Believe me, I am not. I'm a scrawny boy with pretty much zero talents other than somehow always finding a way to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I could give you a list of examples but I'm sure you don't want to hear them. You probably don't even want to read this story now that I've discouraged you so much. Feel free to close the book now and spare yourself the time you'd waste hearing how the world isn't at all like they teach you in school.

Just close it now.

If you're still hear that means one of two things. You are either unnaturally curious or enormously stupid. Whichever one of those you are, I have a feeling we would get along pretty well since I am both of those things.

Well, since you're still here I might as well tell you my side of the story. Sooner or later you're going to hear about me and the others like me and believe me, they will twist the truth as much as they can, calling us a threat to society, an evil that needs to be stopped immediately. Don't believe me? They've done it before.

So, whether you're here to see my side of the story or just to laugh at how shitty my luck is, here is the complete and honest truth told to you by me, Chase Solus.

I remember when I was younger my mom would smile down at me and say that I should carry my last name with pride and dignity because in Latin, my last name Solus meant alone.

According to her we had Latin roots and that a long time ago our ancestors were admired by all, for it took an insurmountable amount of strength to go through life alone, carrying your burden squarely on your back and your back alone.

But I'm pretty sure she just told me that so I would have at least something in my life to be proud of. Because honestly, being alone didn't take a lot of strength. Take high school as an example. All you needed was to be interested in absolutely nothing that the other kids were interested in or have a backstory so weird and uncomfortable to talk about and people will steer clear of you as much as they can.

Lucky for me, I fell into both of those categories.

Unlucky for me, some people just don't seem to get the memo.

"Alright you maggots, center gym now!" Coach Stines screams though there is no clear reason he has to, seeing as the only other sound in the gymnasium is the sound of squeaking tennis shoes.

There are some things in life that are just universally known and nobody actually has to come out and say it for people to know about it. One of those things was that on Monday's, absolutely nobody should talk in the gym unless they want to feel Coach Stines's wrath. You see, Coach Stines is a drinker and, even with the fact that he is well over 50, has yet to ever come in on a Monday without having a massive hangover from the previous weekend.

You'd think that with a hangover he wouldn't want to scream but I think that it just encourages him to scream louder.

"Today, you are going to watch as half of your peers successfully reach the top of this rope and laugh in amusement as the other half fails to do so in the most hilarious matter possible" as Coach Stines shouts to the clump of kids surrounding him, his eyes lock on me on the last part.