Her Story

Lost

December

    I was at my house when I got a text from Sol.

Sol: I need to tell you something.

Me: What is it?

Sol: I can't tell you over text.

Me: Then how are you going to tell me?

Sol: In person.

Me: Alright when?

Sol: Ima gonna go over rn.

Me: Oh okay.

Sol: Yeah

*a couple minutes later*

Sol: I'll be there soon.

When he got here, he was with Antwon. I wondered why he needed Antwon with him to tell me something. I wondered why he needed to tell me this in person. I invited them both into my garage and told them to take a seat. I watched Sol as he walked towards me and handed me a bag of chips and a soda.

"Thank you." I took them and placed them on the desk near me.
He nodded his head but remained silent.
"So, what's up?" I hesitated, honestly afraid of what he'd respond with.
"Well..." He begun to speak but his voice trailed off. He looked over at Antwon and whispered something to him.
Both Sol and Antwon rose from their seats and walked to the end of the driveway. They were discussing something. Definitely about how he was going to tell me what he needed to tell me. I guessed from how many times Sol pulled Antwon aside that it was going to be bad news.

    Finally, Sol told Antwon to leave so he could tell me.

    "So um." He continued. "I uh." He grew quiet, looking at the floor and back at me occasionally. It's that bad.. I thought to myself. I kept a straight face, patiently waiting for him to speak but the suspense was killing me.

    After a little while, he started to speak again.

"I don't know how to say this." He said.
    "Just try your best." I was prepared to wait as long as it took, afraid of what he'd say.
    "W-we can't talk anymore." His voice sounded genuinely sorry that he had to do this but I didn't understand why this was so hard to tell me. Everything in my mind got jumbled around and I didn't understand what had just happened. After a couple seconds which felt like hours, I replied.
    "Okay." I took a deep breath and tried to compose myself but it didn't work. All I felt was sadness and loneliness at that moment. I thought I had prepared my mind enough for this, expecting the worst and everything, but it hit me just as if this were the first. My eyes fogged up and my face got hot. I looked at the ground as a warm tear rolled down my cheek.
    "Okay?" He sounded confused by my simple answer.
   I was angry. Not at him but at myself. How could I let this happen.
    "Yeah, Sol! What do you expect me to say?" I almost yelled at him but I immediately lowered my voice, assuming he didn't want to hear it. Just then, he saw the tear and didn't talk. He looked away then back at me often, probably wondering what was going through my mind. I saw him get up from his seat and walk out of the garage. I thought he was going to leave but he met with Antwon at the driveway. They talked for a minute but Antwon was the one who returned. He tried to cheer me up I guess. At that point I tried not to care about what had happened but it just hit me so hard. So I just acted like what he said was distracting me. Soon after Antwon came to me, Sol approached me slowly. When he reached me, he opened his arms for a hug. I hesitated for a moment, wondering if hugging him would be a bad idea, if it would make me cry again and even harder. But I pushed those thoughts away and pushed myself up and off the chair, yearning to cherish what could be my very last hug from the person who made me very much happy but just as confused. I hugged him tight, my face was so close to his neck and I liked the way it felt. I didn't want to let go. I didn't want to lose this. But I let go and they left. Another tear ran down my cheek, then a few more. That night I couldn't sleep. Maybe it was because of how much I was thinking. How much I was crying.

He's gone.