Chapter 8: Grin and Bear it

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Lennox Blackwood

He left that night, after a heated session of baby making.

It's odd, how I just now realized it.

We've had sex so many times that I can't count and even now I can still feel the imprint of his cöck in my nether regions. He's bitten me, licked me, fucked me, but he's never kissed me, not once. Not to mention the position. Always me on my stomach, ass up for his poundings.

Beatrix hasn't made an appearance for a while, which I'm glad for. 

We've been together for all of a month and we've made no progress in our so called relationship. Our bonding ribbon, tattered and faded, now lays on the dresser he cleaned out for my things. My mother always kept it on display in an antique frame. It hung in the living room, right above the fireplace for everyone to see, now it lays forgotten, no longer cherished.

Griffen left with Blackwood. I still can't bring myself to call him Nox, or even Lennox, and I doubt he would want me to anyway.

Senna seems even more distracted and we try to keep each other busy over the next few weeks. I can tell she misses her mate and I can smell the change in her scent as she starts to show the symptoms of early pregnancy. I've been taking care of her, but her mate should be here to do this. It is hard for a pregnant female to be away from her mate. She needs him to provide, to care, to give her strength.

I make my way downstairs to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. Senna is already there, hunched over the sink.

"Don't push yourself, I know you haven't been feeling well." I guide her to the living room to take a seat before pouring her a glass of water.

"Thanks Wren, I hate that you have to take care of me." She sniffs, she's been really emotional the last few days.

I don't tell her that I wish I were in her place in this moment, because maybe then Blackwood would be happy with me, would care for me, would share his food. I can't deny that his absence has effected me.

I miss his scent.

I miss his presence.

I even miss his fuckings, no matter how brutal they can get sometimes, because at least we are truly connected in those moments. The ache in my canines is almost unnoticeable now. I've gotten used to it. I wonder why I've never brought it up to him, why I've never tried to discuss it with him and then I remember that he hasn't tried either.

It's been two months since our bonding ceremony now, and a month since he's been gone. Senna is now two months into her pregnancy. She talks to Griffen daily on the phone. I haven't spoken to Blackwood and as far as I know he hasn't asked for me.

It's as I'm making breakfast that I notice my temperature start to rise. I feel overheated, but take no note of it until lunch time when it starts again, only worse. I'm panting at the sink and Evie, noticing my discomfort, runs for her mommy. Rose appears in the next second in all her pregnant glory, glowing like a damn lightning bug.

"I think you should get some air sweetie." Rose is guiding me to the back porch to sit in the cool breeze, but it's not helping. Evie is hovering and some of the unmated males are sniffing the air. Rose's mate, Cole, rushes out. Rose most likely mind linked him.

"You think she's in heat?" He's whispering, like it's a dirty word, like I'm a failure for not having a pup in my belly.

"Maybe. The males are sniffing around, I don't know what to do. Alpha Nox isn't here."

Cole is quick with his answer. "Lock her in the house. Put her in her room and don't let any unmated wolves in, not for anything." He has a stern look on his face and my skin is itching and searing. My clothes feel like they are rubbing me raw as I'm pushed back into the heat of the house.

Cole is on the phone and I can hear him on the other end, my mate. He sounds tired, angry. "She's in heat?"

"I think you should come back, the single males are sniffing around. Her scent is strong."

"I can't." He's disappointed. He knows I'm not with child. I walk away and lock myself in our room, in my room. I don't want to hear the rest.

I try to sleep it off, but the searing pain I am feeling isn't the good kind. I scream myself awake and Senna is at my side, holding my hand and telling Rose to call the pack Doctor. I don't want to see him. I just want my mate. I need him here. He's the only one that can take away this pain.

I'm surprised when I notice the doctor is female, and more surprised when I notice that it's Beatrix.

"I don't want her in here!" My throat is raw, but my words are clear.

"I'm sorry we have our differences... But I'm only here as a healer." Her voice is annoying and i don't want her scent, the scent I spent weeks fucking out of this bed, to be in here.

She just stands in the doorway, a syringe in her hand and hangs her head. It's hard to watch a female go through this, no matter how you might feel about them.

"Give it to me, I can do it." Rose takes the syringe, filled with some sort of sedative, and plunges it into my arm. The pain starts to ebb and I drift off, realizing that I don't know the first thing about this pack.

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