Spotlight ▹The 1975

0.7

ZERO•SEVEN
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WHY DID I FEEL SO SHITTY WHEN HE SAID THAT?

Because he was right. I was wasting my years on something I hated, so why the hell was I still doing it? How could someone else admit something in my own life? How did Matty, someone I barely knew, understand my fear of not fulfilling what I wanted to do in life?

Why the fück did I start crying?

Matty's eyes were trained on me. The other members, looked in different directions awkwardly as my eyes became watery.

I didn't mean to push you the wrong way but-"

"Maybe I shouldn't tell someone with such a higher net worth then me this but," I paused pulling at the skin on my arm,"I don't want to continue with this conversation." I said hushed.

He took another drag from his cigarette,"Does that mean it's a bad time to ask if we can swap numbers?"

Of course it is...

I pulled out my phone silently and handed it out to him.

"Can we swap too?" Adam said pulling his out.

"I'm going to guess we are all going to swap now, so I'll jump in, Ross?" George asked.

He took out the cell from his jacket.

"Okay well maybe there is flooding, but do your fücking job!" Clifford yelled causing me to jump,"Hello?"

"Clifford, do you want me to do it?" I asked typing the number in one of the rings.

"I don't get it they just seem to like you better!"

I sighed, handed back the phones and grabbed my own to call a cab, voicemail.

"Um, there not answering, it's late and flooding, not a good combo. Can't you call someone else?"

He shrugged,"I'll try."

"You can take a ride with us if you like." Matty suggested.

"It's fine. Really, we can get someone."

"Do you live far from here?"

"I guess. I don't know."

The rain continued pouring, and I continued to take it in.

"It is getting pretty hard, you want to wait in the car until?"

"Um...?" I looked over at Clifford and he nodded,"Okay yeah."

Three minutes later were in sitting in the white Ford and I'm squished to a window, Clifford is sitting on the car floor next to my feet, Adam is enjoying the luxury in the front seat, and then to my right, Matty, George and Ross are trying to get comfortable.

"Anything?" I asked impatiently.

"My brother is a heavy sleeper like me so, no. But I can call Brian."

"Are you kidding?"

"No."

I sighed slouching in the seat, enough for Clifford to have a head rest on my thigh,"Then call him."

"On it."

"I didn't mean to get you upset," The curly haired, tobacco smelling boy said,"I'm sorry if I did."

I smiled at his kindness,"It's alright-"

"Is it?"

I looked into my lap,"I don't know. I've never met anybody who questioned myself better then I did."

A bit of silence.

"Is it hard talking to me?"

"For me, it's excitable, nerving, because I'm a fan but," I shook my head,"No, not really."

My stare lingered too long, yet he didn't seem to mind, because he stared right back.

I snapped my head back to Clifford,"And?"

"Shh." He hushed me raising a finger and adjusting his head on my leg,"Brian hey I- listen her you fuc-"

I pulled the phone away from him,"Hey Brian, its Tate."

"Why the fück is it appropriate to call me at three fourty in the morning?"

"We need a ride, think it's possible at the witching hour?"

"See you later today at work Tate."

And then like that the call ended.

I handed my phone back to Clifford shaking my head.

"God how much more of an ass could he be?"

I dropped my head in my hands.

"You going to walk in the rain? Or are you taking the ride with us?" George asked.

I inhaled deeply and nervously,"I guess were taking a ride."

•.

Brian you ass