Girl of Gold «ᴢᴇʀʀɪᴇ»

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I had never seen Zayn more beautiful than he was now.

This was probably the greatest month of my life. Zayn and I were now closer than ever. When I first met him, I knew he was broken. I knew he rejected people’s love towards people. I thought it was because he had lost someone he loved. I was dead wrong. I know now Zayn had never loved anyone. Zayn was never loved himself.

At the same time, the past month was probably my worst month. I was a liar. I was lying to both myself and Zayn. I promised we would have no secrets. I never told him who I am. How was I supposed to do that?

“Hey, Zayn, I’m actually a goddess from Greek religion!”

Ha! Like that will work.

Nonetheless, it kills me knowing that Zayn doesn’t think I have some sort of deep secret when I actually do. It’s not fair that I’m lying to Zayn. Zayn doesn’t deserve any more pain; he’s already had more than enough. A month has passed, and I’m basically dying. I couldn’t take it anymore. I needed to tell Zayn who I was, tell him my secret. I couldn’t wait any longer.

But I was risking everything. I was practically risking my life, and I was immortal. I’ve already confessed once, and look where that got me. I can’t bring myself to say who I am again, even if I want to. If I do confess once more, who knows what will happen to me! I’ve already been exiled, so the punishment may be worse the second time around.

I don’t if I can even trust Zayn. Well, it’s not based on trust. I’m pretty sure I can trust Zayn. I’m just unsure if he’ll take the information well. I could tell Zayn, but he could end up telling everyone. I could tell Zayn, but he may think I’m a freak and leave me. I feel like the weight of the entire world is on my shoulders. I was under so much pressure and I felt like I was about to explode.

I needed to tell Zayn. I needed to tell him now.

If he can trust me, I can trust him… right?

✘✘✘

I’ve never felt so nervous before. Even sitting on the special tree, I still felt nervous. I was sitting of the branch and swinging my legs, looking down at the grass. I’ve done this before and it always relaxed me, but this time, it only made me more anxious. When I looked at the ground, I could feel the gravity pulling me down. The weight I felt on my shoulders was pushing me down, which only made it worse. So many thoughts were running through my mind.

You shouldn’t tell him.

He’s going to think you’re a freak.

He’s going to leave you.

You’ll lose everything.

Do you really want to do this?

I exhaled deeply, but it just came out as incredibly shaky. Was I this nervous? Maybe my brain was right. Maybe I shouldn’t tell this to Zayn. It was good to go with my brain, right? After all, of all the times I’ve followed my heart, I ended up in grave danger. I was going a different way this time.

“Perrie!” I heard a voice say.

There he was, walking towards me in a giant jacket and regular jeans. His hair was styled to perfection and he put a beanie over it. He looked up at me and his eyes sparkled as he smiled. Zayn’s appearance was enough to just make my heart melt.

“You wanted to see me?” he asked. Hesitantly, I nodded. “You could’ve just come up to my door, Pezz. You know I’m always there.”

“I just wanted to see you here,” I said. It was sort of true. I wanted to tell Zayn by this tree. After all, this is where he told me his secret. I was going to do the same, but now I wasn’t. What Zayn doesn’t know won’t hurt him, right?