Girl of Gold «ᴢᴇʀʀɪᴇ»

Epilogue

Dearest Perrie,

 

Hi.

I honestly couldn’t come up with a better greeting. That was the best I could come up with. I’m sorry. I wrote this because I had a big message to portray, but I couldn’t come up with a greeting to give it that grand feeling. Funny, isn’t it?

I’ll start now before I get off topic.

Perrie, before I met you, I was having an existential crisis. You’ve heard me say this already, but it’s true. I found no point in living. I always wondered why I even existed. That was until you came.

To be honest, I never really liked you at first. It was all because of that stupid tree. (Well, I wouldn’t really call the tree “stupid.” I don’t think trees have to mindset to be stupid, and it’s our tree.) I didn’t like you for “stealing” it—and don’t laugh at me for saying this. I was really possessive over that tree.

Almost every day after that—thanks to the idiots I call my best friends—I got to hang out with you. I got to know you as more than “the girl who stole my tree.” (YOU STILL BETTER NOT BE LAUGHING!) Back then, I didn’t get why Liam, Louis, Niall, and Harry liked you. I just thought you were annoying. Now that I look back at it, I was pretty foolish back then.

Speaking of Niall and Harry, they’re still together. Engaged to be married, actually! Harry decided to man up and propose; he didn’t want Niall to propose first, since Niall was the first to ask Harry out. I’d thought you’d like to know about the future husbands. I was actually planning on proposing to you one day. Call me crazy, but even then I knew you were going to be the girl I was going to marry. And don’t say I didn’t get to marry you. We’re already married in my dreams.

Back on track, I got to know you better and better every single day. I began to fancy you, soon enough. I was starting to fall for your smile, your laugh, your hair, your personality, your everything; I was starting to fall for you. Even when I tried to get myself to stop fancying you, I knew it couldn’t be done. You were too amazing.

You could guess what happened next. I fell in love with you. I couldn’t really describe how I felt. I just knew that you were the only person I ever paid attention to. When you walked in the room, it was like you were the only person there. You became the only person I could see. As strange as it sounds, this is true.

You could say that’s the main point of this letter. I just wanted to say that I love you. I don’t think you’ll be able to hear it often, so I’m taking this chance to say it.

I love you, Perrie.

I know that a while ago we had a bit of a falling out. You know I couldn’t handle loving a person. You know I was afraid of them leaving. That was my greatest fear. I afraid that Harry, Niall, Louis, and Liam would find a better friend than me. I was afraid you’d find someone better than me, and that you’d leave me for them. I was a little bit paranoid, but that’s all over now. I was afraid of trusting you, because I knew you were capable of lying. And I hate to say you did lie to me, but that was in order to save yourself. I never really understood who you were until then, so I sort of victimized myself. Boy, was I wrong. I’m sorry for that.

I really want to thank you. I want to thank you for putting up with me. I want to thank you for trusting me with your secret. I want to thank you for keeping mine. I want to thank you for knowing my fears and always sticking by me when facing them. I want to thank you for showing me a love I’d never received. I want to thank you for showing me I can let people in.