Fight For You

Chapter 21

I called in sick the next day. I wanted to call in sick for the rest of my life. As soon as Jackie left I went to get the vacuum out of the closet and ended up throwing it across the room. I didn't stop there and tore apart. I kept hitting and destroying until there was nothing left to break.

I was just trying to do what I thought was right—avenging my family and the love of my life. But all that got me was fucking heartbreak. I'd dated other girls before Jackie, but I'd never had this kind of heartbreak when they left me.

And none of them ever called me a monster.

My phone had been ringing all day, but I didn't want to talk to anyone. I didn't need to hear congrats from the guys about my latest hit or have my colleagues call and wonder why the fuck I was missing work. I just wanted to be alone. That's where someone as fucked as me deserved to be. Alone.

"Nicky? Nicholas Fucking Ragusa I know you're in here! What the hell did you do to this place?" Ang's voice rang through my condo. I should have never given her a spare key. Fuck.

I pulled the covers over my head, thinking maybe I could just avoid her. No such luck. Her heels clicked on my wooden floor before she ripped the blankets off of me, throwing them on the ground. "Way to answer your phone, you selfish prick!"

"I'm sick, leave me the hell alone." I turned over, groaning.

"Bullshit." A searing pain dug into the small of my back and I grabbed onto it, feeling the center of her heel poking into my back. "Fuck, Ang, quit it." I pushed her heel back and sat up. "What the hell's the matter with you?"

"Everyone's been trying to call you and you won't answer your fucking phone. I even called your fucking girlfriend and she said you two weren't together anymore, so I figured you were in here moping about her like a little bitch and I'd come get your ass up." She put her hands on her side. Angeline Ragusa didn't take any shit from anyone, especially not me.

"Can't you just let me have some fucking peace? I didn't give you this much shit every time some douchebag broke your heart in high school." I tried to turn to my side, but her hands were on my shoulders, forcing me to look at her.

"Nicky, look at me. This isn't about you right now." She pinched my shoulders so hard I thought she drew blood.

"Then what the fuck do you want, Ang?"

"Uncle Guido's dead. He's fucking dead, Nick," she cried, the tears spilling from her eyes.

My heart stopped and my breath caught in my throat. Not Uncle Guido. He never did anything. He wouldn't hurt a fly. It had to be a mistake.

I shook my head. "No. It can't be."

She nodded, the tears streaming down her cheeks. "I wish I were lying, Nick. They found him by the dumpsters at the restaurant with a bullet through his head."

"Fuck," I whispered, running my hands over my face. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." I clenched my fists at my side. "Did they catch the bastards who did it?"

She shook her head. "Of course not. No one saw anything."

"This is all my fault." I shook my head. "I took something of theirs so they did exactly what Dad told me to do to them; took us out right in the heart." I put my hand to my chest; it felt like my heart was breaking into a million pieces, the pain was so bad. I really was the monster that Jackie said I was.

Ang sat down on the bed next to me, putting her hand on my back. "Hey, don't say that. This isn't your fault. You couldn't have known that any of this was going to happen."