Lilium

Eighteen

Eighteen

"Wait, wait, wait, Oliver?"

Lilith only blinked in response, head lolling backwards. She squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her lips together, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Lil, he's dead now, remember?" Jack said again as she pulled Lilith back to her.

"No!" Lilith slapped her hands over her eyes and keened. "No, no, no! He was there! He was there, Jack! He was standing in my living room and staring at my pictures, smiling that same stupid smile that --"

She froze, hazy images filling her head. Oliver's crooked smile as he stared past her, clothes soaked through with blood and eyes closed. She could still feel the slimy mixture of his blood and sweat and the bathwater on her fingers, if she tried hard enough.

RED. I'm sick of red.

She shook herself and scrubbed at her face. "Oh, it doesn't matter anymore!"

"Lilith! Calm down!"

In response, Lilith's fingernails moved to her scalp and she dragged them through her hair with widened eyes. White-hot lines in her skull marked where her nails had dug through. Someone yanked her hands away and held them still when she moved to strike them. The fight left her, as quickly as it had come on and she slumped forward into Jack's chest.

"You... must honestly believe that you saw him today, huh?"

Lilith nodded, entire body trembling as she bit back sobs. Her hands balled up into fists again in Jack's grip. "I can't go through this again," she said.

"I know."

"You sure it was him," asked Cole as he stepped for them. Lilith heard his feet as they trampled over the grass.

"It had to have been," Lilith replied. "Same goddamn smile. Looks just like I took a photo of him – if he had a tail."

Jack recoiled. "A tail?"

Lilith pushed herself back and crossed her legs. "Yeah. You know," she said as she wiped her face, "like a rat's tail, I guess?" She waved a finger in the air for emphasis. "Like he was a demon or something."

When she looked up, Jack's lips were drawn taut.

And here she'll try to tell me that this was all some sick delusion. Lilith counted the seconds off in her head, gaze trained on Jack's mouth.

Finally, Jack exhaled and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Lil, I love you, but you know demons don't exist."

Though she'd saw it coming, the words still stabbed at Lilith's heart. "You don't know that," she replied. "They could be. And they have to be. Today alone I met a vampire and my dead brother and was --" Lilith paused. On second though, telling them about any of this might not be a good idea...

"The day those things exist is the day my breasts come in," Jack said with narrowed eyes.

"You're saving up to buy progesterone," Lilith replied.

Jack wrinkled her nose. "You know what I mean. The point is, well..." She glanced at Cole.

"You've been having a tough time," Cole said as he sat down beside them. "Especially these last few weeks. Are you sure it wasn't stress that was making you feel like this? Making... you see things?"

"Thank you," Jack mouthed, to which Cole dipped his head. Lilith's hands clenched into fists in her lap. As she seethed, she picked at the stray threads of her shirt.