Weddings

Chapter 07

Paul got dressed, leaving the steamy bathroom and standing in his hall for a while, unsure what to do next. Beer or bed? Safe to say our guitarist wasn't planning on doing anything too tricky today.

After a moment's debate he chose bed, padding down the hallway towards his room. He opened his bedroom door and felt his heart swing as he saw his little boy was here after all, and had chosen the same route through the day as his father. Paul reminded himself that Emil wasn't actually all that little anymore but honestly, he missed being a daddy to Emil, having the ability to look after his son a little bit.

Emil was sprawled out in his father's bed, the duvet half covering his body, half falling to the floor. His phone was by his head, his hand just inches away, fingers outstretched towards it. Paul surmised that his son must have fallen asleep texting someone.

He tapped Emil's leg softly, shifting his sleeping son out of the way so he could recline against the head of the bed. Remote in hand, he looked on apprehensively as the TV flickered into life. Please don't be too loud. Please, please, please.. Oh shite! Paul hit the volume control, making the TV as quiet as possible for his hearing. Subtitles.. How the fuck do I put them on? He quickly checked Emil, making sure the sudden noise hadn't disturbed his rest.

Finally he was sitting, watching a nostalgia programme about 70's music. After a while Emil shifted beside him, turning over and pushing himself up on the bed a little so he could put an arm over his Dad's waist and have a cuddle. He looked at the TV for a moment, then back to his father. "Dad?"

"Hmm?"

"You angry again?"

"No son." Paul breathed in through his nose, blinking sleepily and absentmindedly patting his son's shoulders.

"Good...I'm a bit angry now Dad."

"With me?" Paul felt a little startled, turning to look at his son.

"No! Well, yes... your hair angers me a bit I suppose." Emil grinned cheekily at his father before continuing. "With my girlfriend."

"You were talking to her?"

"Yes."

"Wanna talk about it?"

Emil looked at his father momentarily. "Nah, you're okay Dad." Why not?

"You know you always can, if you want?"

"Yeah but it's a bit awkward isn't it?" Emil wrinkled his nose and grinned uncomfortably.

"Is it?" I wonder if he'd tell his mother. Is it me that makes it awkward for him?

"Yeah. It's about... She cheated because... She was going on about..." Emil blushed a little, sitting up and shifting to the other side of the bed. "Sex... and stuff." He finished, coughing uncomfortably.

"Sex and stuff?" Paul let the questioning tone in his voice be as subtle as possible, so it would be Emil's choice whether or not he responded. I see... so this is quite an awkward topic after all.

"Yeah." Emil scratched the back of his head, avoiding eye contact. "She just.. it's all she wanted."

"You.. weren't having enough?" Paul tried not to reflect his son's awkward behaviours.

"No, I think we were. But I mean... It's just... It's all she wanted."

"I don't understand Emil."

"I mean... the relationship and everything else; moving in together, spending time with each other's families, thinking about starting our own, she didn't want that."

"Oh!" It took a moment for the weight of his son's words to hit Paul. "Oh shit! Oh Emil, I'm so sorry, that must have been really tough to find out."

"Yeah. Especially cos I just came home and she was there with him fucking her against the living room wall." Emil looked like he didn't know whether to be bitter or heartbroken; his face twisting as he mentally relived the experience of finding his partner with another man.

Paul reached out a hand and stroked his son's arm. "Emil, I know this is hard for you, but these things do happen, and perhaps it was better, y'know, to find out like this. Before you were married and had kids or something."

Emil sighed, looking angry as tears sprung from his eyes and silently fell down his cheeks. He drew in a deep, shuddering breath. "I just don't understand how we could be so close, and so intertwined in how we thought and how we were together and still go this badly wrong." Richard

"How can two people who know each other so well be on such different pages?" I wish I knew.. "How can someone who does care for me, who must care for me after all the shit we've been through, just hurt me like this? Hurt me and feel no remorse! She said she hoped we'd still be friends. It's like she doesn't realize I love her! I love her dad, my heart is breaking!"

Paul lurched forward, encasing his tearful son in his arms, "I know Emil. I know." He whispered soothingly, feeling his own tears beginning to fall as he stroked his son's hair. "I know exactly how you feel and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for you." Emil clung to his father, his whole body shuddering as he wept.