Sneak Peek

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A snowflake landed on my nose as as I walked through the dilapidated warehouse. We would meet here...discuss turf relations with rival gangs...but it seems like it was nothing but a memory now. It had been at least six years since the Titan Uprising had failed. We aren't being terrorized by them anymore...the only threat now is the sudden increase of police brutality that plagued the nation. 
  Six years.... It's really been that long? It seems like yesterday I was burying my best friend, nut really? Six years? Glass from broken alcohol bottles cracked and crunched beneath my feet as I neared the exit. It's the first day of winter....Normally, the younger members would try to make the place look festive. Lights and tinsel...hell Petra's damned scented pine cones. There were so many memories held here....And I miss them....I miss her. 
  After the funerals....graduation...she left. She chose to attend college in Spain and her folks packed up and moved the fuck out of the districts. I recently found her on Facebook. She had graduated recently. She's a freelance journalist and a press secretary for Obando and Co....and she's engaged to the CEO's son. I looked through her photos just to see of she was happy. And from the looks of it...she looks pretty happy. She's as beautiful as the day we first made love... Senior year, spring break. I wonder if she thinks of me from time to time. We haven't spoken since she moved away. She probably doesn't, she's engaged. Does he love her enough? Does he tell her how he feels about her? Does he spoil her with cuddles and kisses? Did he buy her that puppy she always wanted? Is he a better lover to her than I was? Is she happy with him?

I miss her...and I don't know when I'll get to tell her how much I love her. The leaves crunched beneath my feet as I got closer to the train tracks. I did expect her to move on especially since it's been six years. But it hurts. I wonder how long it took her to move on....is she still holding on like I am? Probably not, she's going to marry some man that can guarantee her safety...and promise her that he'll be home to hold her every night. I wish I had the chance the tell her. I wish I had've told her what she wanted to hear. She wanted me to be with her, to make a promise that I knew I probably wasn't going to be able to keep. I couldn't promise her that I'd be there to hold her, that I'd be there to cuddle her when she's cold, I don't know when I'll die. And during the time with the Titan uprising, I couldn't guarantee her safety or my life. I couldn't promise her the inevitable.  

After she left, I left too... there was no need for me to be in the districts anymore. I moved to a small town on the outskirts of the districts. I'm only here visiting Hanji...things get kinda tough for her around this time. She hasn't been....well, Hanji, after we lost our friends, our family. She left the legion too. So I thought I'd be a good friend and spend Christmas and New years with her. We're both alone other than the Shiganshina trio and the rest of my squad.
  It seems like everyone moved on with their lives after [Name] left. It was as if she was the thread that held us all together. Hanji tells me that she and her still keep in contact... funny. She wants nothing to do with me. 

There was a strong gust of wind as I got closer to Hanji's house. Yanking my hood closer to my head as I sped walked to the little steps of her house. I knocked on her window in a rush. It's cold as hell out here. I like the winter but I like it when I'm inside, not out in this shit. I heard that goofball fumble with the lock and drop her keys....and then fumble with the lock again before it swung open so fast. I expected her to damn near tackle me but she looked....suspicious.  She had that 'up to no good' smile on her face as she beckoned me inside. 

"What the hell are you up to?" 

"What do you mean?" She asked closing the door behind me. Her voice was low, as if she didn't want someone to hear. 

"You know what I mean and why the hell are you-" 

"Hey Hanji, the hot chocolate is ready! And who's at the door?" 

That voice.... I didn't fully take my coat off  before I walked towards her voice. I swung it off, not caring if it was on the floor...she's here.... 

"[Name]..." 

"Hi....Levi."

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