Blessing Monroe
"Where's my baby's!" Shooting up from where I was laying in a cold sweat I felt dizzy but ignored that and the pain that had shot from my dry throat to my head.
Throwing the covers off my cold body I looked down at my flat hospital gown as I let out a long dramatic cry tearing the hospital cable cords off of me. "Where's my baby!"
"Somebody go get the nurse or a doctor!" Rushing to my side Farah tried to get me to lay back down. "You have to relax the nurses will be here in a few minutes-"
"Where's my baby?"
"Blessing she was-
"Where is she!"
"The doctors don't know if she's going to make it there was so much blood she didn't cry she-"
Feeling my heart shatter in to a million pieces I got back in the hospital bed as the tears poured down my face.
"Mrs.Monroe I'm glad to see your awake love how are you feeling?" Rolling a chair in front of me as she rubbed I had down my arm I laid still as silent tears poured down my face.
"Your stress level is extremely high and your cancer is worse than we've ever seen it we're doing everything in our power to help you and your baby-" everything after that grew irrelevant to me as I laid there feeling lifeless.
Pulling the covers over my lifeless body I ignored the sound of everyone's voice tuning everyone out as I grew in to a deeper depression.
It went like this for weeks and weeks turned in to months wile they had my baby in and out of the hospital.
Robin stayed in the hospital until she was 2 months and finally was able to come home with me.
She was very tiny and we didn't know why, the doctors said she was under weight so for most of the two months there I wasn't able to feed her the doctors and nurses had to.
She was a quiet baby rarely smiled or laughed but she was just as beautiful as Ruby and Ruben following behind her father in looks it scared me how strong Rakims genes were. I was started to think I needed the DNA test.
Rocking her in my arms it brought tears to my eyes thinking that I almost lost her. She was a fighter just like her other brothers and sisters.
Junior and I were basically the same person every pain I felt he felt and it was weird to me and I hoped he grew out of of it because I didn't want him to be depressed like me I wanted him to be happy.
Ruby was a bundle of joy though doing everything in her power to bring a smile on to our face and like always she never left her brothers side.
I felt bad that during these two months I pushed away everyone who tried to help me even though I needed them the most.
Feeling like this was something I needed to face on my own I didn't want anyone to be around me especially while my child was practically on her death bed and her father was somewhere with no clue on what was going on.
I didn't have time to focus on me or my cancer because I was to busy making sure my family was okay to think about my sickness.
Beating cancer and getting it back was something I had become accustom to I just didn't understand why it kept coming back.
Placing her Robin in her crib I let out a yawn as I rubbed my eyes. It was 3 in the morning and my babies were all slumped in here with me.
They had got so used to always being in here that they didn't even bother going to there rooms anymore.
Walking out the room and towards the kitchen I grabbed the baby monitor closing the door behind me even though my room was sound proof so I doubted they would wake up I still needed it by my side for reassurance.
