Brothers In Arms

Chapter 12

Josie intended on taking Jax's advice but she couldn't even wait a day before asking Opie to join her for lunch. Although she knew he wouldn't turn her down or stand her up, her stomach was in knots, only tying tighter as she waited at Hanna's.

"Hey," he huffed as he joined her. "Sorry, kind of a busy morning."

"No problem," she tried to hide how anxious she was. "I actually really appreciate you meeting me here."

His smile was forced and Josie felt her heart sink a little. "I just... I really like you. This is the first time in years I felt something substantial for anyone and I wanted to apologize for everything, basically."

"Yeah," he sighed, anxiously playing with the silverware on the table. "You don't have to apologize and I know what you mean, you're the first person since Donna that made me look twice." He hesitated, despite having built a trust and connection as friends, he struggled with putting this out there. "I hate being lonely, I'm miserable, but you're not over your husband, I sure as shit ain't over Donna, and after what happened with Jax I think this would be more bullshit than it's worth."

Pulling her head back and immediately breaking eye contact with him, Josie nodded and quickly brought her mug to her lips to hide her quivering chin. "Okay," she mumbled. "I wasn't expecting that."

"I'm sorry," he said with sincerity. "I want it but-"

"If you did want it, like you said you did before, you'd go for it." Josie said quickly. "So, don't do that please. It's Jax, it's my past, and it's our messy dead spouses that ruined it. I get it."

"You think I like this shit?" He huffed. "I get up every morning and when I realize what my life is I hate it. This," he moved his hand between them awkwardly, "Would just cause more shit for us in the end."

"It's fine," she said sadly. "I get it. I feel the same way when I wake up I just thought we'd work, we'd help each other, but you don't."

"I'm sorry," he sighed.

"Me too," she groaned. "For all this shit."

Opie felt awful. He knew admitting the situation with Jax was an issue was bad enough without the detailed breakdown of their feelings. "I don't want you to stop coming around."

"You sure?" She sniffled still but looked more hopeful. "I have fun with you guys. I really love the club. I'd be crushed without you and Abel and Jax."

"Of course." Opie reached over the table and tapped her arm to pull her attention away from the tabletop. "You make me smile," he admitted, clearly embarrassed.

"Shut up," she rolled her eyes and tried not to blush. It didn't matter how quickly, and definitively, he turned her down, Josie still had feelings for him. Opie didn't have to try to make her swoon, his usual behavior, his adorable awkwardness usually did the trick. "I'm actually staying with Abel tonight so you won't get rid of me even if you tried."

"I gotta find someone to watch my kids," he groaned. "My mom is," he shook his head, "Doesn't matter."

Josie gave his boot a swift kick. "You wanna talk, we can."

"I do, but not now," he waved his hand as if to dismiss her offer.

"Okay, I'm here though," she shrugged. "And if you want I can watch all three of them," Josie offered. "As long as Jax doesn't mind."

"Please," Opie chuckled, "I don't think he'd mind, I need you so I can go with him."

"Ahh," she laughed and gave him a knowing look. "Working on that info I gave him?"