Falling In Love With A Flea (Shizaya. IzayaxShizou)

Izaya's Secret

Okay.  I just really quickly, before I started this part, wanted to thank all of you so much! I got a lot of excellent feedback from all of you and I REALLY appreciate it! I'm super glad you guys are enjoying my story! :) I hope you guys continue to enjoy! ♡

Izaya POV

After quite a while, I finally managed to calm my breathing and stop my tears.  I stayed, cuddled against Celty's stomach for a little longer.  It was warm, quiet, and I felt safe.  I stayed there enjoying the peace for a moment before slowly sitting up and wiping my tears away. 

"I-I'm sorry." I whispered.  I realized that I was completely vulnerable in those moments. 

"No. No its alright Izaya. We're both always here for you.  Right Celty?" Shinra soothed glancing at Celty.  Celty nodded her helmet in agreement. 

Yeah. We are your friends. You can always count on us. But at the same time I hate seeing you so upset. What happened to you Izaya? Celty typed and then showed me.  I hung my head and fiddled with my fingers. Should I tell them what I saw? No.  They wouldn't understand unless I explained my entire past, and that wasn't an option.  I didn't want to see that sympathetic look. Not again.  I didn't want them always pitying me. I wouldn't live like that again. 

"I-i just.... had some bad memories resurface is all." I explained. I didn't lie.  That was true.  But that wasn't the whole truth exactly. I suddenly began to shiver. It wasn't cold in Shinra's house, it was just, the second I said that, terrible memories from my past popped into my head again.  Then I heard them again.  The voices.  The voices swirling, yelling, whispering, always inside my head that I could normally distract myself from.  But this time they were louder, more persistent.  They must know I can't push them away right now.  I'm exausted.  But I don't want to hear them anymore! Why can't they just leave me alone!?! Then I heard those screams again. Those blood curdling, heart wrenching, soul crushing screams of agony. I heard them.  But I was powerless to help that poor soul stuck in an endless eternity of torturous pain.  I squeezed my eyes shut, enveloping in the darkness behind my eyelids. Why couldn't they just shut up! Why do they always talk!? WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN HEAR THEM!?

Shinra POV

Seconds after Izaya answered he seemed to space out completely.  The lights in his eyes dulled to nearly nonexistent.  He just stared out into emptiness. He sat still, unmoving. Completely catatonic. I waved my hand in front of his face, nothing.

"Izaya?" I nervously asked. No response. "Izaya!?" I called again. No response. "Izaya please. You're scaring us!" I called out worriedly. Izaya didn't move. I took out my small flashlight and checked his eyes. He didn't even flinch. And that's when I started to get really worried.  "Izaya!? Wake up!!!" I shouted. Celty looked at me. What's wrong Shinra? Will he be okay? You never get upset. Running through her thoughts.  I looked at her worriedly. "He's gone catatonic Celty.  Unresponsive." I explained, looking back to the frozen Izaya. Suddenly Izaya's hands rose and made fists in his hair.  Izaya's breathing became faster and heavier.  He closed his eyes as more tears fell down his pale cheeks. I heard him whimper as he curled up into a ball. Izaya began to rock back and forth in the ball.  I then heard him whisper something that I couldn't make out.

"Izaya? A-are you okay? I-i didn't understand you." I whispered, very worried about my friend in this state. Izaya didn't answer and only rocked faster. He then began talking again. 

"No....no.... just stop. Please....... stop.....i..... can't...... just......i.....silent..... darkness......." Izaya muttered shaking.

"Izaya?" I asked worried. "Y-You're really scaring us. What's going-" I was cut off by Izaya screaming.  He screamed and kept screaming.