Philophobia || Shin Soukoku

4

{Atsushi's POV}

-

Oh no.

Oh HELL no.

I was almost frozen, standing only feet away from my own personal nightmare feul. Why did he have to be here? Why now? I just wanted to buy food, damnit!

While he was walking further into the store, he took a quick glance back at me. He looked less murderous than usual and more.. disturbed? As if I could make him uncomfortable. "Returning the favor" isn't something I usually do with people like Akutagawa.

I snapped out of my thoughts and unfroze myself, starting through the store with a list of things I needed on my phone.

Milk
Eggs
Mozzarella string cheese
Basically the general groceries.
Whatever'll keep me alive.

Even though I couldn't see him any more, I couldn't get my mind off of the thought of being in the same place as that asshole.

Think of something else.
Animals.
Skunks.
Black and white.
Like Akutagawa's hair.
Wait, uh...

I kept walking; each step might as well have resounded with the sound of my irritation, whatever that sound would be. The sound of steel scraping on a chalkboard, maybe.

I cringed at the thought of that sound and turned down the dairy aisle.

Are you kidding me?

Bam! Akutagawa was already there. He didn't seem to notice my being there yet. He looked eerily calm. It wasn't something I'd ever seen, what with being his personal punching bag.

Honestly... when he was further away like this, not plotting which mark to leave where on my body, he looked so...

How do I put it? Not bad? Non-repulsive?

Fuck.

That's what you'll be doing later.

Conscience, who invited you? Get out!

He isn't cute.

Stop denying your sexuality.

He's cute, I guess, but I'm not gay.

Close enough.

I didn't catch myself staring until he was staring directly at me. He made eye contact, and I panicked.

"Shit." I whispered hoarsely to myself, not moving a muscle aside from my anxiously shaking hands.

"What the hell are you here for?" The mean look was back. Not as intense as usual, but enough to scare me.

"Uh... Groceries?" A small, nervous smile spread across my face and I put a hand on the back of my neck.

"No, really?" His voice dripped with sarcasm, "I mean why are you staring at me like I'm some pretty boy."

-Time Skip-

I closed my apartment door behind me and slumped back on it, letting myself sink to the ground, curling my knees in. I wrapped my arms around my knees and sighed loudly. I'd been awake for about two hours- not even- and I was already exhausted.

Luckily enough, all I had suffered was a discreet-ish kick to my ankle, not even enough to bruise. Which was surprising; I had a tendency to bruise easily, which reminds me, my face was still bruised as dark physically possible, well, not really. It'd healed up a little but it was still just as painful.

Maybe I should get concealer or something to cover it up.

I burried my face in my knees for a few seconds before taking a long breath in and standing up drowsily. I let the air pour from my lungs and my shoulders slouched dramatically.

I was tired, no, far beyond tired. And all because of a coincidental encounter with some skunk-looking-asshole who shouldn't be allowed to have such a pretty face. Even the sight of him has always made me uneasy, even more so now that I have to question my sexuality every time I see him.

But, even despite his looks, he's still a terrible person who constantly hurts me physically and emotionally and deserves to be arrested. Although, looking at it from a different angle, he could have his reasons for doing what he does... I don't think I want to know what they are, though.

It's probably some sort of dark backstory that no one ever knew. Boy, would that be fun. Or he could just be a psychopath, it could be either. But I don't really care. I shouldn't ever get involved with him more than this, no matter how curious I get.

Crap.

What?

I've got piles of homework to do.

Then do it.

But sleep.

Never.

Alriiight...

-

I'm starting to come out of my writer's block! Just not in the most convenient way, seeing as I was writing part of this in class...

I plan on writing the next chapter from Akutagawa's POV. Because lemme tell you, it's about to get good.

Very good.

Very yes.

Be ready, folks.

I'm gonna sleep now since I've got school tomorrow- goodnight peoples!