ten things you need to know / k. hendricks

.6

Eleanor

Sometime last year, when I was staying the night in your apartment, I woke up in the middle of the night and had a panic attack. You woke up shortly after, and you wouldn't go back to sleep until you knew I was falling asleep.

I told you what caused it the next morning. I told you I was having one of those dreams again- they happen from time to time - and I confided in you, and told you what happened to me.

But the thing is, I told you a small piece of what the story really was.

But you know I went to Boston College, and you know I was in a relationship with someone my junior and senior year. I told you some stuff about him, and I told you what happened to me. I told you I left him and the city of Boston right after graduation.

In Winter 2012, just a few weeks after my birthday, I went with him to a frat party. I hated frat parties, but I still went. I don't know why I went, but I wish I hadn't.

Kyle, you're the third person I'm telling this next part to. This is what fully happened, not just the little fragment that I told you that one night.

One of his frat buddies slipped something into my drink. I don't know who, but I know that my ex-boyfriend knows. He refused to ever tell me.

But whoever it was that decided to slip something in my drink raped me in that frat house while I was unconscious and my ex-boyfriend guarded the door.

So when I woke up, I was completely unaware of everything that even happened. But he knew.

And he didn't even tell me until two weeks before graduation.

I broke up with him right there, but I still had plans of staying Boston after I graduated, but I just couldn't do it. The guy that drugged and raped me was walking the streets, a free and happy man, and the guy who let him do it was walking beside him.

A month after graduation, I couldn't handle it. I told my parents I was leaving to "accomplish something with my life," but that's not the truth.

I lived with my aunt and uncle in Wilmette until I could got my teaching job in the city and my own apartment.

Kyle, I'm sorry I never told you what really happened. It was already hard for me to tell you that I was raped, I couldn't bring myself to fully talk about what happened and it's still so hard for me to.

But you are such an important person in my life that I couldn't live with keeping it from you anymore.