if you have time, listen to the song!
it's my favorite!
I Want You by Savage Garden!
you'll love the chorus...
CHAPTER 16
YES OR NO
"I am not in the mood to quarrel with you so just leave..."
"I said we have to TALK. I did not say we have to QUARREL, Kira. Don't look at me like that, Kira." She sighed. "I just want to ask you one last last last last thing. I'm just... desperate... to know... the truth."
"Look blondie, I'm really tired right now. I want to rest... and my definition of REST is 'blondie - free'." I said, emphasizing the word rest.
"I have a name you know..."
"What?"
"You never call me by my name," she explained. "My name is Analee so don't just call me blondie. Tell me Kira, why is it so hard for you to say my name?"
I asked myself that same question too! I do not know why but I found her name so difficult to say. When I first met her, I hate saying her name because it annoyed me. Her name, her voice, her hair, her eyes, everything about her annoyed me.
But now her name doesn't annoy me anymore. Now that I know - and I am sure - that I love her, now that everything about her drove me crazy, in a good way, I still cannot say her name! It just does not make any sense to me! All I had to do was open my mouth and say 'Analee'." Damn, it was so easy to say!
"I'll call you blondie, demon or even bitch if it pleases me," I said instead.
She flinched when I said the word 'bitch' but smiled in spite of it. "Okay... fine... whatever you want... as long as it pleases you."
"Now, can you leave?"
"No."
"Damn you!"
"Damn you too for making me feel so worthless!"
But you are the most important demon in my life, Analee! You have no idea how hard it was for me to see you with Lachlan! It was a real pain in the ass not to be able to touch you, hug you, and kiss you!
My life was a mess, Analee! If Ashtar found out that I love you too, I was sure you would be in grave danger! Ashtar will hurt you knowing that it would hurt me too! And my father, my damned father! He wanted me to get rid of you!
I was doing all of these to protect you. I will do everything to keep you safe. If hurting your feelings by denying my true feelings for you will keep you alive then I am willing to endure the pain.
"I love you, Kira," she said, and it caught me off guard. "And I hate myself for loving you so much to the point that I don't give a damn anymore if the demons around me, including you, think that I am dim-witted and pathetic."
I love you too, the voice inside my head screamed. "If you love me then why did you sleep with Lachlan the other night?"
"Are you jealous?"
"No."
"Then why do you want to know?" she challenged.
"Nothing... I was just wondering if you love all the men who will be willing to sleep with you and give you pleasure." Damn. I should not have said that. Hell, I was too jealous and angry at the same time that I do not know what I was saying anymore!
"I am no whore!" she said at the top of her voice. "How dare you insult me like that? Lachlan is a good friend. After our date, I went to him because I know that he is the only person who is willing to listen to me! I just slept there!"
