only takes one time

15

dex

i woke up this morning and heard the twins starting to cry. They were starting to sleep during the night and  i was grateful to have my sleep back.

I got up even though i didnt feel like talking or smiling i still did it.

when i went in there i seen it was sterling starting to cry while cole slept. I grabbed him and went change his diaper and then put him in his rocker in my office and started working as he played with his canopy

"having fun fats" i said as i rolled past him

"dada" he said and i went to him and he went reach for my hair. I picked him up and put him in my lap as i worked

Corrie entered the room and i gave her a slight head nod before going back to work

"when did you get home" she asked sitting on the couch. I didnt notice cole in her arms but he was just chilling watching me hold sterling. I think his ass was plotting against sterling but i barely get time alone with sterling.

"9ish" i said as i calculated something and answered Nino back

"did you feed him" she asked and i shook my head and she got up coming to  get him

"i got it" i said getting up and walking out the room and down the stairs fixing his bottle and answering Tez.

"yeah" i said

"you coming to the trap today" he asked

"yeah in like a hour hours i was taking care of the twins and getting dressed you and Nino there" i asked

"yeah well i am Nino on the way he had to go fill out his insulin" he said

"ighti should be there soon"

"ight" he said and i hung up

"going meet someone" corrie said coming down the steps trying oce again to grab sterling who was focused on his bottle

"i got him dam corrie" i said irratated by her constant need to try and take him away

"i was just trying to help you dont have to talk to me like that " she said back

"talk to you like what like you not trying to take my son away from me i just told you earlier that I had him where is cole" i asked 

"upstairs still in your office"

"go tend to him" 

"im not a bitch you can yell at" she said and i rolled my eyes

"im not josh you aint about to yell at me like i am" i said sticking the bottle in sterling's mouth and heading upstairs

i put sterling in his play pin

"goddam it Dex what the hell have i ever did you"

"what are you going off about now i let you live in this huge house i told you finish school i buy you what you want"

"and i can care less about all of that dont you see it if i treated you the same way you would be like me ive been holding my tongue for the longest you dont fucking care about me i live in this house to dont you think i should know when your leaving or who your talking to"

"no you dont need to know any of that" i said back calmly

"why do you keep pushing me away " she askedand i closed my eyes.That was the same argument i had with Lennox the day he died.

"just leave me alone" i said more eagered to get up the steps and this time she didnt chase me.

in the shower i cant lie i cried alittle first i lost chance then i lost lennox ehy would i wanna be close to anyone else. When i got out i put on some black sweatpants and a white wife beater