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Kotaro Bokuto
北村真墨
~

I don't know what was keeping me from punching my father in the throat more: Akashi's gentle hand in my own, or the presence of my wonderful grandmother. Either way I wanted to punch the bastard.

"Who's this?" Satan himself asks, motion towards Keiji besides me.

"A friend." I murmur, pulling Akashi with me to the other side of my grandmother's bed. I sit in a chair, Akashi sitting on the arm of it.

He's tense and I don't blame him. My father's a homophobic man, obviously not pleased by Akashi's presence.

"Hey hey hey Kotaro." My grandmother says, her voice soft and weak, almost a whisper.

I smile through the tears forming in my eyes, using my free hand to take one of my grandmother's.

"Hey hey hey nana, long time no see huh?" I mumble, glancing up at Keiji and watching as he gives me a smile.

"Oya, who is this pretty boy with you Kotaro?" She wiggles her eyebrows, causing not only myself, but Keiji to laugh as well.

"He's a friend Nana." I laugh gently, feelings the tears slip down my cheeks at her state.

She's so pale, oh so pale. Her eyes carry deep bags under neath them, and she actually has wrinkles forming on the corners of her eyes. She looks older than she is and it's killing me.

We sit and chat for about an hour, talking nonesense like we always do. Akashi, just to spite my father, was soon on my lap, leaning his back against my chest as my arms were wrapped around him.

He got along with my grandma so nicely, the two chatting up a storm. It caused me to smile, my heart warming at the feeling.

But it all came to a stop once a nurse came in to give my grandmother medicine. Akashi and I were asked to leave, since visiting hours were over.

Akashi grabbs his coat, avoiding eye contact with my father as he walks out, myself following him.

As soon as I step out the door my name is called and I stop dead in my tracks. I glance over my shoulder to see my father walking towards the door.

Akashi is soon by my side as my father closes the door behind him. I've grown a lot since he's seen me, therefor I'm as tall as him now.

"What?" I snap, cocking an eyebrow in the air.

"I'm sorry for leaving you all those years ago." He says, showing no sign of emotion in his voice.

I snort, letting out a chortle before speaking: "Cut the shit Kastu, you know you're not sorry. You left me and you don't care two shits about it. I'm here for my grandmother, who actually raised me unlike you. Don't bring up the past, don't try apologizing. Actually do us both a favor and don't speak to me got it? I'm not here for you." I snap, watch as his eyes widen slightly.

"Fine then son."

"Call me by my name, you don't deserve to call me son." I instruct him, my anger boiling in my bones.

"Fine, Kotaro." He seethes. "But what ever happened to that dear Terushima you loved so much?" My father smirks at his last remark and walks off.

My hands clench at my sides, the vein popping in my forehead. He struck a nerve there. He knows damn well that Terushima and I broke up a long fucking time ago. Yet he brings it up because Akashi's here.

"You asshole!"

I react almost instantly, charging at my father quicker than Akashi can grab me and hold me back. I turn the man around, my face red with anger. I swing, my fist colliding with his jaw, sending him falling back.

"Kotaro!" Akashi yells, but I ignore him.

"You have no right to bring that up! You have no right to even be here right now. You were never there in the first place so why try and be now. You lost your shot, so why try again?" I seethe, my breath quickening, my voice becoming louder and louder with each sentence. "Is it pleasurable to you to watch me suffer in pain? What does it take to get through your thick skull for you to understand that you are an asshole. Why did you even leave? Why DID YOU LEAVE?! You weren't even there to see your own mother become sick! WHAT KIND OF FUCKING MAN ARE YOU?!" turn to see doctors and Keiji staring with wide  eyes, but I don't care.

"Kotaro." Akashi tries again, but I ignore him once more.

"You never sent me birthday cards, or anything. It's like I never existed to you. And you know what...." I stare down at this bastard who holds his cheek on complete shock.

"You mean nothing to me. You are not my father, you fucking bastard." Tears slip down my cheeks at this point. "Why do you hate me so much? Why did you ever leave? I needed you and you left me by myself. You never said goodbye, I never got an explanation. Hell, nana didn't even know why you left. But none of that matters any more, because you don't matter." I cry out, my vision almost completely blinded by my tears.

"I don't want to see your face ever again."

I storm off, right past the elevators to the stairwell.  My sight is completely blurred from the endless tears that fall from my eyes.

"I hate him." I mutter, walking down the stairs faster.

"I HATE HIM!" I'm screaming now, my hands pounding against the cement wall in the stair well.

"Kotaro." I turn around to the gentle voice and see Akashi standing there, his arms wide open and tears falling down his own cheeks.

I turn my body towards him, falling in to his tight embrace. He holds me tight, almost as if he's afraid to let me go.

"I hate him so much."

"I know Kotaro, I know. "

~~~

:(

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