<< Internet Love >>

>>21<<

Rose's POV

Kian and I haven't talked for a while now. I felt so distant from him and I hated it. Before we got in this relationship, we were really close and talked everyday. Now, we barely see each other. No texts, calls, nothing. I decided to go get over myself and go talk to him. I dismissed the tour schedule crap on the table and drove over to Kian's place.

When I got there, I knocked on the door and waited for an answer. A few seconds later, Kian opened the door and I sort of froze. I haven't seen him in a week, I didn't know how to act around him anymore.

"Hey." He said quietly.

"Hey." I repeated.

It felt so awkward, it's not supposed to be that way between us. It hasn't been this way since this stupid tour came up.

"Come in." He said and opened the door for me. I walked in and he followed. We sat down on the couch and faced each other.

"It's not supposed to be like this." I whispered after a few moments of silence has passed.

He sighed, "I know."

I looked down at my hands in my lap and tried to come up with the words to say. "Kian, I'm sorry that I haven't been around much and that I've been so busy with tour. But you haven't even called..."

"I know, I'm sorry. I just didn't know what to say." He said. "This tour...I don't know if I can be apart of it...I don't know if we can survive it."

I nodded and tried to stop the tears that were threatening to escape. "I understand."

He sighed again and placed his hand on my cheek, causing me to look up at him. "Rose, I want to be with you. Trust me, I do. Just not like this."

"So, are we breaking up?" I asked.

"I think we are." He said.

I felt this pain in my chest, like I wasn't just loosing a boyfriend, I was loosing my best friend. Kian is one of my favorite people in the whole world, and now I'm loosing him just because of a fucking tour.

As a tear rolled down my cheek, I placed my hand on his cheek and kissed the other one. I then stood up and quickly walked out of the apartment, leaving the one person I've really connected with behind.

~~~

"Mac, get another box of tissues." Hazel demanded and passed me another chocolate bar. Mac quickly got up from the couch and came back a few seconds later with a new box of Kleenex.

Ever since I left Kian's, I've been crying on Mac and Hazel's shoulders while eating junk food and watching horrible movies. I know that we weren't together that long, it was only like five minutes, but I have so many feelings for him and I really thought we would make it.

"Honey, I'm really sorry this happened." Hazel said softly as I kept my red and puffy eyes on the tv screen. "I know you really like him."

I sniffled and grabbed a tissue from the box Mac was holding. "It had to be done." I said sadly, my voice cracking.

"You know what, fuck him!" Mac shouted. "He's a douchebag! You deserve better!"

Hazel and I turned to her and gave her pointed looks. I motioned to my tear stained face and the used tissues surrounding the three of us.

"Not that kind of break up. Okay." She said shyly and looked down at the floor.

Hazel scoffed and placed her hand on my shoulder. "Rose, I'm sure this isn't the end. You two really like each other, so it's not like you're never going to see him again."

I shrugged, "I don't know."

"Didn't he tell you that he wanted to be with you?" Mac spoke up.

"Yeah." I said quietly.

"Exactly, he just said that he didn't want to be with you like this. So maybe after tour, you guys will be together. See, everything will be fine."

I sniffled again and broke off a piece of chocolate from my Hershey bar. "I don't think that's how it works, Mac."

She shrugged, "You never know."

~~~
Kian's POV

I locked myself in my room ever since Rose left. Like the heartbroken loser that I am, I've been listening to sad music on Spotify for hours. It only made me feel worse.

I couldn't help but feel guilty and responsible for us not working out and breaking up. I shouldn't have stopped talking to her all because I was scared. It's like I ended things before we even broke up.

I don't even know if tour was to blame for this. Maybe if I hadn't been so scared of a long distance relationship, everything would've worked out like we had planned. But no, I had to be a fucking coward and loose the woman that I love.

Wait, love?

I shot up in my bed as that though popped in my head.

Do I love Rose? Holy fuck, I do. I love her.

I ran my hands through my hair as I came to the realization. I smiled at the thought of her, of all the times I had kissed her pink lips and her beautiful smile.

Then I remembered that we broke up. That I won't be able to kiss her again. Or make her smile. I won't be able to tell her that I love her.

I frowned and laid back down. Thoughts of her invaded every corner of my mind and tears started to roll silently down my cheeks.

I fucked up.

~~~

Please don't hate me.

Hey hoes, it's Maddie with a very depressing chapter. Sorry. But two updates in one day! Yay! 😬

Guys you gotta hold on there's so much more to cum.

How do you guys feel about the break up?

Kian loves Rose and my heart is broken 😭

Anyways, the song above is One Last Time by Ariana Grande and yes I put a lot of her songs because they're bomb as fuck #arianator

Sincerely,
Madz 👸🏻🤘🏻💖