Skipping Rocks and Falling in Love - Harry Styles fanfic

PART TWO.

I quickly shook my head in attempt to clear all unnecessary thoughts out of my head. I came here to relax and reflect, and as a result I ended up just drowning myself with upsetting flashbacks about the fuss that I had earlier with Bertha and John. I came here to clear my thoughts, not to constantly relive them. 

Nice one Rose. Real great. 

I sighed in frustration while naturally slumping my shoulders in disappointment. There was nothing I could ever do that would help me move on from my trouble's. Not just the problems of my past, but recent problems that occured every now and then with my foster parents. This was something about me that I detested majorly. Sure coming to the lake would help me think and let loose, but only for such a short amount of time. This lake it created a route for me, almost like an avenue that would allow me to drift away and escape from all my worries. It wasn't necessarily the lake itself that made me feel so at peace, but the memories that it beholds. Some of the most unforgettable memories I had cherished with my father before I was thrown away. You're probably wondering why? Why I didn't use the term 'abandonned' instead. 

Well you see, there isn't much of a difference. 

I looked ahead of me staring off into the distance. The neverending magical waters continued to move soothingly and calmly with such patience and ease along the shoreline of the lake. I closed my eyes for a moment taking it all in. It was like music to my ears, a perfect melody almost. After a short moment I slowly opened my eyes revealing once again the beautiful lake in front of me. Usually whenever I woke up in the morning, I would always wish I would wake up and open my eyes to see myself as someone other than myself. I hated my life, not only that, but I hated myself as well. But today was different. I was at the lake, and there is not another place I would rather be. A salty tear slowly trickled down my cheek for most likely the hundredth time today. I wouldn't be suprised if this very lake was formed of my tears of sorrow. It probably was. I didn't bother wiping it, because I already knew deep down that, that very tear would soon be accompagnied by many more, no doubt.

I sat there, silence taking over my thoughts as new tears were welcomed, and without permission began to stream down my cheeks. I didn't know what to do or what to feel anymore. I wasn't even sure of life itself . I sat there  puzzled, staring at the view in front of me concentrating hard. My intense concentration was then completely broken when a curly haired teenage boy, who appeared to be  around the same age as me decided take a seat beside the bolder right next to mine. I jumped back, slightly startled by the boys presence. No one ever usually came here, except for me of course, so it definetly came across as a big suprise. The fact that someone else other than me was at the lake did indeed suprise me. Infact, it suprised me a lot. But what seemed to seriously amaze me even more was the unusual fact that an actual boy decided to even sit next to me.

You see, I was never really the type of girl that guys really took interest in. I was more of an individualist. Rarely spoke to anybody and barely anyone spoke to me, that's how it always went. I was a nobody, but to be honest, I like it better that way. I didn't want to have any friends and drag them into my very own personal problems. I already had enough of trying to solve them and forget about them on my own. I guess I just never really opened up to anybody or even gave anyone the chance to let me trust them. That was just me, and I couldn't seem to explain it. 

My life is a complicated puzzle, and what do you know? So am I.

Having said that, I've always been extremely insecure about my looks and appearances. Whenever I'm around anybody I feel worthless. Like I'm just never good enough, almost like I can never meet the standards of beauty. I look around me and I always see beautiful girls. Long hair, twinkling eyes , petite figures it just makes me self-concious to know that I'm far from that.