Not My Choice

VI

Stepping from the car, I looked around slowly. Everything looked just as I remembered, though there were a few slight changes. Several of the houses had a different paint color; dozens of little children ran around playing in the front yards.

Turning around, my eyes barely make out the top of the alpha manor, the attic window glinting from the afternoon sun. "Welcome home sweetheart," my father's voice pulled me from my thoughts as I looked at him. I didn't return his smile as I grabbed the small bag of clothes that the Blane clan gave me. "Your old room is still yours. Your mother and Roman spent an entire day getting it ready when we learned that you were alive."

I nodded my thanks as we made our way into the house. From the subtle glances that my parents exchanged, I knew that my silence was eating away at them. The last time we had seen each other, I had been like a little magpie, always talking about something. They followed me up the stairs to a dark blue door with my name written on it. I remembered the day that I had managed to convince my mom to let me do that, only because Daniel had done his bedroom door like that as well.

Opening the door slowly, I let my eyes explore my room. The princess stage that I had been going through was gone. In its place, the room resembled that of something a mature young woman would live in. Royal blue walls, with accents of silver and gold floating around before my eyes; I loved it. Looking over my shoulders, I meet my mother's tear filled eyes and gave her a weak smile. "Thank you mom, I like it."

She tried to blink away her tears as her smile grew. "Why don't you get settled in and clean up a bit. We're having a welcome home dinner for you at the manor. The entire clan is looking forward to seeing you again." I only nodded once as I watched her and father head back down stairs.

Sighing, I slowly sink down onto my bed, falling back as my eyes closed. Roman moved silently into my room, sitting down beside me. "Tonight Roman," I speak softly as I sigh softly, "Tonight you will have your first lesson. We'll wait until after mom and dad are asleep."

"Alright Jules, sounds good to me." I almost smiled at the way he sounded. While he wanted me to teach him, he wasn't sure about it. That's when it hit me. Roman was more worried about sneaking out and getting caught, than he was about getting caught practicing with me. "What time is the dinner tonight?"

"Alpha said it's to start at eight, and its two now." I nod and stand up. "I think I'm going to walk around. Tell mom that I'll be back in time to eat." Roman said he would as I left my room. I could hear my parents' voices coming from the kitchen as I silently slipped out the front door and quickly made my way towards the forest.

I hadn't set one foot in this forest for almost twenty years, but as I quickly made my way down an almost forgotten path, I found that I still knew my way about. In the back of my mind, I could hear my six year old self laughing as she flew down the well traveled little path as a ten year old boy ran after her, yelling that he'd get her back. But his words were just hollow threats because the smile on his face told the truth.

It wasn't long before my legs ate up the distance and I found myself standing under the largest tree around. My eyes slowly scaled the tall giant as memories that I had fondly held onto rushed through my mind.

"You'll never catch me Danny!" Six year old Julian called out; laughing as she quickly lunged for another limb, pulling her body higher. "No fair! You're cheating." Daniel called after her, doing his best to catch up. She stopped for a moment to look down at him, her little face glowing with happiness and Daniel froze.

The look of pure joy and happiness that washed over her face had his young heart racing like a runaway train. His breath caught in his throat as she smiled at him, her eyes sparkling. He swore that he'd do his best to put that exact same look on her face every day of his life. Daniel was too young to realize it, but at ten years old, he had fallen completely in love with his best friend.

They were almost to the top of the tree, neither of them noticing how thin the limbs were getting when Julian turned to look at her friend. "Who's the bravest now?" Julian called down to him, smiling as she thought she had won the bet. Daniel's laughter filled the air as he jumped off his perch, his small hand wrapping around her ankle.

A loud crack filled the air as the branches gave way underneath them. Neither Daniel nor Julian would ever forget the look of pure terror on the other's face as they plunged towards the ground.

Shaking my head from the memory that had pulled me in, I walk under the tree, slowly pulling myself up onto a branch. I climbed swiftly towards the top, stopping when the limbs started to become too small to fully support my weight. Taking in a deep breath, I close my eyes and felt my body relax.

I know that it's a sad fact to admit, but I couldn't truly remember a time when I was this relaxed. Or for that matter, felt this safe. But I knew that those feelings were a façade. I would never truly be at peace... not after what I had to endure to survive. My face twisted as I forced the dark thoughts away. It had been my fault, all of it.

That day when I was six and Daniel almost died- it had been my idea to scale the tree to see who the bravest of us was. Daniel was dying and so I decided to use my gift, a curse that I had hated after that, to save his life. I altered our lives by doing so, but after everything I have gone through, I would never regret saving his life. He was my best friend and I loved him.

I shook my head at that. Love, what did I know about that?

"Do you plan on spending your first night home up there?" A deep voice startled me, and with a yelp I lost my balance. Branches and leaves slapped my face as I plunged towards the ground, frantically trying my best to grab onto something. As the ground rushed closer towards me, I closed my eyes and waited for the pain that would come when I made my landing. Yet, none came.

Instead, a pair of strong, warm arms caught me and tightened around me quickly. I honestly couldn't describe the feeling that washed over me as I found myself being held in the arms of a man I didn't know. Quickly scrambling away from him, I warily watch him. "I am sorry for startling you. Your parents sent me to find you seeing as how the party that is being thrown for you is to start... well now," he added after making a quick glance at the watch on his wrist.

"It's alright. I should have known better to go running through the past while sitting up in trees." He chuckled at my words and I found myself almost smiling. "I'm Renner," he said as he held out his hand towards me. Very slowly, I shook his hand back, instantly dropping it as if it burnt me. "I'm Julian."

The smile he gave me caused my heart to speed up a little. "I know. The entire clan has been talking nonstop about you since the news that you were alive and well reached us. I, of course, had no idea who they were talking about at the time. My family joined just a few months after you were sent away to train and learn. It's a pleasure to finally meet you." 

As I followed him back to the clan house, my nerves once again began to grow unsettled. I was about to see my best friend for the first time in a long time. But if I had known that this evening would hold, I think I would have turned around right then and made a run for it.