#28 - What I've done

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The following two days were going to be tough.

I felt nervous and tense as a violin string and the worst thing about it was that I couldn't hide it.

The first one who noticed something was wrong with me -  excluding those who knew about my relationship with Noya of course - was Tsukishima, unfortunately.

"Oi, little piece of sh-" he began.

You son of a bitch, I'm ready to fight you!

"-ortcake"
Actually the way the word ended caused my body to cringe and chills to run down my spine in a really unpleasant way. Sweet words really do sound different when they come out of the mouth of someone you hate.

"You look kinda upset. Let me do something to cheer you u-"
"No, thanks" I cut him off and sped up my pace.
"So rude" he smirked. He didn't look offended even though I did my best to treat him the worst I could.

What a sucker.

I couldn't help but get my eyes wander out of the window during classes and my mind imagine how Noya was doing in that place so far away from me. I craved to place my hands into his soft hair and to inhale his scent. And I always looked at the phone to see whether he was texting me.

Maybe he's just busy...

Still I cheered for him to find the best University and the best volleyball club even though this meant to part from him.

But then, I couldn't imagine what was really happening.
In the evening I just sat there in the Ramen Bar and my bro Ryu was there, standing behind the counter while cleaning it, and listened to me like the typical bartender with his all-time drunken customers.

In those two days, Noya never wrote me a single text. I couldn't help but feel lonely and miss him, but for the first time in my life I didn't feel like I was the reason why someone was avoiding me.
If I was the pain in the arse, then, Noya wouldn't have chosen me instead of Kiyoko, right?
This is why I decided to trust him even though his silence made me sad. I think that when you trust people, everything just feels better: first, you don't have to apologise later for having been suspicious. And second, for Noya's case... love cannot exist without trust.

*Two days later*
As Noya came back to school, I was waiting for him with the other members of the volleyball team in the large parking space beside the gym.

Takeda-sensei's car arrived after some time. It was late afternoon.
Noya and Kiyoko got out of the car.
While Tanaka let out multiple exclamations as a welcome to Kiyoko, my eyes were just for Noya.
Gosh, how much had I been missing him, even for just two days!
I stared at him as if it was the first time I met him. He noticed my greedy and jealous stare and gifted me with one of his sweetest smiles.

Then he left his luggage on the ground and came towards me, closer and closer until he hugged me and gave me the most passionate kiss ever.
My eyes were wide open in shock at first, but still I grasped him and held him tight.

"After all, there was no point in hiding it. You're mine. Everybody has to know this" he whispered "and it's fair that everybody knows that I'm yours and only yours"
"N-Noya..."
"Shut up and hold me"

His words produced discordant emotions on the inside of me. My heart was pounding with bliss but also I was restless with a fierce hunger of him and filled with some sort of fear, some worry about the intensity of his words.
Still, I wanted that moment to never end. Everything was faded when I was in his arms. I didn't care about Kiyoko, Tsukishima or any other's reaction.

"Let's go home, love"

As we walked home, he was silent as a mummy and looked lost in his thoughts. His face showed melancholy and to be honest I didn't know how to deal with it.

At some point, I remember I grabbed his wrist to stop him. He stared at me in surprise.

"Tell me... is everything okay?" I asked.
He hesitated and looked at the points of his shoes for a while.
Then I heard the sudden thump of his luggage being left on the ground and his body pressing onto mine.
It was a really weird, let us say surreal, situation.
His face was buried into my chest and his back started shaking.
I immediately realized he was crying.

He looked like a hurt child who was crying in his mother's arms.
"What happened?" I asked, on the verge of tears.
The vision of him crying nearly caused me to do the same. I had never imagined to see him that way.

"Listen" his broken, shaky voice said while he was rubbing his eyes and red cheeks "I have to confess something".

My heart sinked.

~~~●••●••●~~~

Hey people..! 😄
This chapter is really some kind of drama lol I'm sorry 😂 

As you can see, I didn't manage to be punctual with the chapter for the third time in a row... I actually had some really serious stuff to deal with

Note that I wrote this chapter inspired by Linkin Park's song "What I've done" and this is the reason behind the title lolol 😅😂

Keep voting and commenting my story!

Love you all,

Shiri-Chan96💟  

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