No Love Allowed

Twenty-Three

Sehun came home in a daze. The pain killers kept his bruised ribs in check but did nothing for the ache in his chest. He didn't know what to do. To give in to Suzy's mother's wishes seemed like what he should do. But to do so would deny the feelings he knew he already had. Either way, pain was the consquence. So in attempt to clear his muddled thoughts, he spent hours walking around he estate with no real purpose to his wanderings. No trace of the grand party remained. The ballroom lay as empty as it always did on regular days.

The words of Suzy's mother replayed over and over again in his mind. Had it really been his fault that she'd landed in the psych ward? Had he really fed her mania? Whatever that meant. The only thing he knew about bipolar disorder was the mood swings. He suspected that was what everyone knew about it. He had never met anyone who suffered from it before. And Suzy had seemed so . . .

Normal.

He hated himself for thinking of the word, but it already there before he could censor himself. Her mother had said it would be for the best if he disappeared from Suzy's life. But would it, though? Was it what Suzy wanted? They had agreed they would part ways after the summer. Just thinking about never seeing her again . . .

He had been so careful. At the first glimmer of love from the girls he had dated, he had cut ties. He had convinced himself that all he wanted was no-strings-attached fun. And of course, the first time he had allowed himself to entertain the notion of falling, this had happened.

Eventually he walked into the living room. An entire section of the massive space was covered with brightly wrapped presents - stacked many boxes high. He had forgotten. The party seemed so long ago. Seeing Suzy in that dress . . .

A rectangular shape wrapped in simple brown paper and string stood among the colorful packaging. From its size he recognized one of the canvases he had bought at the art store with her. His feet couldn't move fast enough. He picked up the gift and tore into it like a child on Christmas morning.

As the string and paper fell to the floor, he held out the painting. Unable to appreciate the picture properly, he brought it to a wall where several still lifes hung. He took one down and replaced it with Suzy's work, then stepped back. His heart encloses as if a fist had closed around it.

It was their first kiss. Fourth of July fireworks exploded above them, glittering gold in the night sky of dark indigo and blue. The lake glimmered, reflecting the light show above. It seemed as if the water actually moved. They stood, a little off to the side, in each other's arms. Suzy's white dress was a pop of color in the twilight surrounding them. her face was tilted up toward his, and his hand was on her cheek. He could almost recall the softness of her lips and the sweetness of her taste just by looking at her creation. The brushstrokes were so fine the painting came alive. She had captured the moment perfectly. It showed so much love and emotion.

His eyes welled as he crossed his arms and rubbed his lips. She had given him this. For his birthday. The magical moment they had shared when he finally realized he had let love in. After seeing this, he couldn't just disappear from her life. Not now.

__NO LOVE ALLOWED__

Sehun got into his lamborghini and drove straight to her house. This situation between them would get settled once and for all. He had a few things he wanted to say to the girl he loved.

Parking at the curb, he didn't bother locking the car when he stepped out. He walked to her front door and rang the bell. No one answered. Surely her mother wouldn't have left her alone already? He had checked the hospital. They had gone home. But maybe she'd needed to work. Maybe she'd had no other choice than to leave Suzy alone. His heart ached for them. All their money must have been going to filling prescriptions.

No wonder Suzy didn't bother thinking about college. And, for the first time, he thanked his father for paying her medical bills after the accident. He wasn't sure if they had insurance. Probably not, considering her mother juggled multiple jobs.

He tried the knob. When it didn't budge, he felt around the top frame of the door for the spare key. Suzy had forgotten her keys once and mentioned something about a spare key. At the left-side corner, his fingers glided over a rectangular box. Success washed over him. When he slide the container open . . .

No key.

Cursing, he returned the spare key to the top frame and backed away from the front door.

There must be another way in, he thought as he walked around the house.

The back door to the kitchen was locked too when he tried it. Why had Suzy and her mother chosen that day to be responsible by locking all their doors? He shook his head and continued his search for access into the house. This was his first attempt at breaking and entering, and as much as possible he wanted to minimize the breaking part of the entering. The Baes might not appreciate the extra expense of repairing a window.

When he reached the glass wall of Suzy's painting room, he paused. He remembered the sliding door. Why hadn't he thought of it earlier?

He approached, bending like some sort of burglar. He sent up a silent prayer that their neighbors weren't watching. He certainly looked like a suspicious person at the moment.

At the door, he curled his fingers into the slot and pushed. The glass slid open easily. The soft whoosh seemed so loud. He half expected an alarm to go off. His eyes flicked to the heavens. Thank you, Suzy, for not locking this thing.

Easing the door just a little more, he slipped inside, then slid it shut carefully behind him. When he turned around, his eyes widened. He swallowed, unable to believe what he was looking at.

Every available space in her painting room was filled with painted canvases.

There must have been at least fifty leaning against the walls, stacked five deep. The easel had a canvas, too. And the floors. Everywhere. Canvases upon canvases. From the looks of things, she must burned through two grand's worth of art supplies they had bought with his bet winnings. It blew his mind. Suzy mustn't have been sleeping at all to amass this much art in such a short time.

What kept him from moving farther into the house were the subjects of the paintings. His eyes moved from each one in quick succession, trying to make sense of it all. Some he even had to move aside just so he could see the treasures hidden underneath. The more he saw, the more his feelings for her thicken in his chest.

There were a couple portraits of him. One while he rested on his elbows on the dock as she walked away. There was one from the garden party while he leaned against a tree with her in his arms. The dress stood out among all the green. Another one was of the Summer Swing. The moment when they were on the dance floor. Suzy's first slow dance. Then there was one of their picnic blanket loaded with an pile of food. Several from the Fourth of July party. There were even paintings of his friends. The one of Chanyeol and Baekhyun smiling at each other was particularly fascinating. She'd even captured Kai sitting in front of her vanity leaning forward while she carefully applied eye shadow. So much talent. So much creativity in such a short span.

"What are you doing here?"