On The Sidewalk Bleeding

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Payton

            After telling my story, my throat was raw and my body ached with pain and tiredness. I was tired when I woke up, but I wasn't going to tell anyone that. I had just about fallen back asleep when Kyle and Emma came in, but that was fine. I was actually grateful for the company. After losing the baby, I've never not been tired, so feeling refreshed and as though I had enough sleep, that had been foreign to me for a long time.

            There was a knock on the door, and then it opened - without me answering back - and revealed Kyle. He looked angry, but as usual, I brushed it off. I just didn't have the strength or energy right now to see what the problem was. Because I was always the person to put my own feelings aside and help others, and it's not that I didn't want to help Kyle, it's just that I just couldn't do it now. But the tears sitting gathered in pools in his eyes, they made me slightly suspicious. No high school jock bad boy cries for no reason. They wouldn't want anyone to know - or see - that it was possible that they could have feelings for anyone other than themselves. Hell, they don't even cry when they do have a reason other than if they win a football game.

            "What's wrong?" I ask him, my voice full of caution. He stares at me for a moment, obviously confused, dropping his head, looking down at the ground, and then shakes his head, chuckling to himself.

            "Shouldn't I be the one to be asking you that question?" He's grinning when he looks back up, and I can't help but join him. The goofy, lazy grin that covers my face makes him laugh some more.

            A knock on the door brings us out of our daze of just staring into each others' eyes. I clear my throat before speaking.

            "Come in!" I said, my voice high pitched and squeaky.

            Slowly the door opens, as if to create some suspense for whoever is behind the door. But as soon as I see the person behind the door, my heart seizes and starts beating fast from the terror for the boy standing in my doorway.

            Kyle moves to stand in front of me, blocking me from Luke's eyes. It's almost like he knows about my terror for my abuser. I pull the hospital bed blankets up to my chin, almost as if I was trying to hide myself.

            "What do you think you're doing here Luke?" The warm, funny, and friendly Kyle is gone, replaced by a boy who wears a mask to cover his emotions and speaks coldly to the intruder in my room. It's a vast difference, and I don't think I like how he can change his moods so rapidly; that you know who he is one second but not the next. He changes his moods as fast as Luke, and immediately, I don't feel safe. But I've talked to Kyle a few times before that I know that this is a new mask for him.

            Luke just glares at him and looks at me over Kyle's shoulder, his brown eyes piercing my blue ones. His eyes are full of hate, and he's looking at me like he wants to kill me. But I already know he does, I mean, I spilled my secrets to someone I didn't know.

            It dawned on me that Kyle came in directly after the nurse left. He had tears in his eyes and he looked angry. So, he must have heard the entire story, or at least part of it. I wonder what he thinks of me. I wonder if he thinks I'm weak for not being able to stand up to Luke when he hit me. This new personality change he just had only seconds ago, he wasn't mad at me and it changed in a split second so that he could protect both of us. He could protect himself from the humiliation of almost crying, and he was protecting me from my nightmare that was standing in this room.

            "I want you to leave Luke. Now." My voice came out firm and strong. I wasn't going to sit here like a dog with its tail between its legs. I let the blanket fall to me lap and swung my legs off the bed.

            Standing up was painful. The bruises and cut hurt whenever I stepped or put weight on them. I hobbled over to stand beside Kyle, grabbing his arm so I wouldn't fall over. I raised my head and looked at Luke, challenging him to do his worst. However, being the person he is, his eyes were zeroed onto my hand on Kyle's arm.

            "You cheater! Were you screwing with him when you were with me? You're a slut, and you will pay! No one cheats on me!" His face and eyes were contorted with red hot rage. He stepped forwards and so did I. I could feel Kyle looking at me, but I didn't dare turn to him.

            "I won't have you bullying me, abusing me like I'm your personal punching bag. Not anymore! I'm not a thing you can toss around like I'm some useless object!" My voice becomes quiet, "I'm not doing this with you anymore. I'm done. We're done. Now leave." He stares at me in disbelief, "If you really loved me, you wouldn't have hurt me. You don't hurt the people you love." My voice ends my speech with finality, and my eyes dare him to say something.

            "I told you what I would do if you broke up with me. Now I suppose we'll see just how real I can make that promise. You don't tell me what to do. That isn't a little girl's job." His voice is deadly calm as he turns to leave the room, but the look he gives me right before he leaves makes my stomach clench and as soon as he leaves the room, I feel myself falling to my knees and heaving on the floor. Blood is mixed with my vomit, and I feel bad that Kyle has to see this.

            I feel his hand rubbing across my stiff back and the other hand holding my greasy hair back. My stomach keeps providing something to throw up, even though I haven't eaten anything for a little while.

            Even when I have nothing left in my stomach, I dry heave for a longer time that when I was actually throwing stuff up. The heaving is making it difficult for me to suck in a breath through my mouth, so I have to try my best with my nose. At some point, there was a cold cloth put to my burning forehead. I don't know who put it there, or when; my sense of time is a bit out of whack.

            I don't feel Kyle's hand that is still rubbing my back, my body is too numb, but I know he's still there. I might have my eyes closed, and I might still be heaving air, but I can feel his presence beside me. It's kind of weird. My body leans towards his like he's a magnet and I'm the metal that's attracted to it. And suddenly I'm not heaving anymore and I'm curled up in his lap, tired, and I count four breaths before I'm fast asleep.