Save Mikey Way

11?~Epilogue

Gerard.

It's December 25th.

And it's my baby brother's funeral.

Mikey.

He..he killed himself.

When I was gone with Elena.

Frank called me at 2am five days ago to tell me while sobbing uncontrollably, shaking and voice cracking what Pete had done to my baby brother for the second time and what Mikey for not what I thought second as well, but instead, something he did quite often.

Needless to say I fainted and Elena had to pick up my phone to talk to Frank.

We rushed to the hospital in an hour, when it would normally take us 2,5 hours.

Mikey's lifeless body laid in a hospital bed for four days, with the hope that doctors would bring him back to life.

After trying to remove the pills of his system, it was already too late. It was a lost cause.

Elena didn't stop crying and neither did I.

Frank approached me one day when I was sitting next to Mikey at the hospital and told me he had to show me something even if he didn't want to.

He showed me his fucking self harming scars.

Frank self harmed.

Frank was depressed.

Frank had thought about suicide but had never attempted anything.

Frank was broken and I hadn't even noticed.

The only reason I didn't join Mikey is Elena.

She wouldn't be able to cope.

So today was Mikey's funeral.

My eyeliner couldn't hide the unbearable sorrow I was not-so-well hiding.

There he was, lying lifeless in his coffin.

Looking paler and skinnier than ever.

Looking dead.

My brother was dead.

After Elena spoke, it was time for my speech.

I chose not to go for much as I wanted to sing a song with Frank and Ray playing guitar as well.

"Mikey. He'd always been my younger brother. The brother I swore to our mother I'd look after my whole life. Is now dead. Mikey, I know you can hear me so I'll leave you with this. Since I'm bad at saying goodbye, I refuse to let this be one. So instead I'll just say see you later. I miss and love you. Your brother, Gerard."

I was about to break into tears when Frank and Ray got next to me with their guitars and started playing a melody they had written just for this and I started singing.

"Does anyone have the time to bring me down?
And can I sleep all night long to the drums of the city rain?
Just make it up
'Cause I'm awake all night long to the drums of the city rain

And brother if you have the chance to pick me up?
And can I sleep on your couch to the pound of the ache and pain?
Oh, in my head 'cause I'm awake all night long to the drums of the city rain

The lights we chase
The nights we steal
The things that we take
To make us feel this
I can't go back
Don't think I will
I won't sleep tonight as long as I still hear the drums of the city rain