My Past or Present!

Chapter 10

*Jhanvi Pov*

I just stood there staring at her sleeping form with all the toys she likes surrounding her. Why did I rush into all this? Where was thinking and the past mistakes?

Wasn't once enough with my jumping into everything and returning with nothing? Now, again, I rushed into more complicated things.

But... but standing here, I know it is not a complete bad thing. She was... she was too alone and I have seen her looking lost when one day the people came to adopt but didn't glance at her.

Wasn't I there? Wasn't I having the same feel of lost when people used to come to the hospital and choose the kids? Didn't I try to settle myself with just the life I got, feeling great full for it.

Isn't the reason for my rush behind that person craving for such belongingness? Isn't it the reason for being pushed to the edge of a cliff in the life and thrown over by the betrayal?

How can I let someone else get the same fate? I may can't do it for everyone else but this little girl will not have such future.

But what I did is right? Because in the end she got a father figure who was supposed to be the only bad person in this world for me and now Ali added himself to it.

And god! What will Kalpana say if she gets to know about my marriage? Marriage! What was I thinking?

Can I... can I just turn the time and escape from this? I thought and glanced at Lakshmi with a smile, knowing well I wouldn't want to.

"She slept off?" a voice brought me out of my thoughts and I stiffened before nodding.

"Shall we have dinner?" he asked again and I nodded again.

"Look, you can talk to me. It's not like something will happen if you do that." He said sighing.

"I am not talking because I don't want to." I stated and turned to walk out, but saw him standing near the door with stillness.

"Fair enough but you have to bear my talking though." He said after a few seconds shrugging and walked away.

"Here!" he said suddenly when I was about to stand up finishing my dinner which was a silent affair.

"What is it?" I asked him, frowning at the card and keys.

"These are house keys and the card is for any expenses or any needs you want to buy." He replied normally.

"I don't want your money. And I already bought for Lakshmi for this month and even more." I said pushing them back.

"You are my wife and it is nothing." He said with a frown and confused face.

"I am not your wife and I can take care of myself." I said taking a deep breath.

"How?" he asked, leaning over.

"I have decided to go for work." I replied and he sighed.

"You do not think do you? She just arrived today and you want to leave her here and go?" he asked closing his eyes.

"I will have a night duty and at that time, she will be sleeping." I replied through gritted teeth and stood up.

"And I do know how to take care of kids. I have already done it and..." I stopped in mid sentence and gasped for air realizing what I was talking about.

"Shh... please don't think about it." I heard the words and even felt the arms around me but I was shaking.

"You can't go back with Lakshmi to be taken care for." With that words I turned to stare at his face.