Big Girl Boots

Twenty-Three

"Blake." I heard my name being called distantly but didn't bother to respond. I was too busy staring at the cafeteria wall with my mouth hanging open in the slightest. I wondered if I was mouthing the words that ran through my head, but didn't really care if I was. I was busy thinking about things that were way more important than the opinions of kids at school.

Coda had stayed home that morning with mama Callie's approval. We hadn't shared a single word since she exiled me from her room and the major happenings in her life. As much as I loved the girl, I was leaving it up to her to get her shit together and talk to me like an adult.

I had glanced into her room, though, to find her still curled in bed in the same massive sweats and hoodie she'd been wearing yesterday. Her chest heaved and shuddered and tears streamed down both cheeks from her closed eyes. It hurt me to see her cry, but I knew I was the absolute last person she wanted to talk to about it. Instead of trying to comfort her, I'd just slunk down the hallway and poured a cup of strong black coffee that would have to work for breakfast.

"Blake!" The voice came again, this time accompanied by a solid jab to my left bicep. I snapped out of my trance and turned to glare at them. Dustie scooted her brown metal chair away at the sight of my irritation, hands held up in surrender. "Woah, sorry."

When I said nothing, she pressed further. "You okay? You're super spacey today. And by the way, where's Coda?"

Instead of staring blankly at her like I wanted to, I glanced helplessly to Kellan. I hadn't even been told about everything that was going on, and I wasn't about to just spout a distorted version of Coda's problems to the world, even if I trusted Dustie. In all reality, Coda didn't want it to be my business, and it wasn't. At my pleading, he spoke up.

"She had a pretty rough couple of days so she stayed home."

"Oh." Dustie went quiet for a minute, staring at her red plastic tray of slimy chicken in contemplation. I hadn't even bothered to get lunch because I didn't feel up to eating, and looking at the greasy meat on her tray, I was glad. It would've been a waste of money. "Is she okay? Can we do anything?"

I shook my head, not waiting for Kellan to respond. "No, and no. I'd leave her alone if I was you."

Dustie stared at me with furrowed eyebrows and I had a feeling she planned on bringing it up again later. Like me, she could be quite the bulldog. That was one of the multiple things I found great appreciation for in that girl. As I stared listlessly at her mostly untouched meal, I couldn't help but compare the two of us. Dustie loved rodeo more than anything, hated school, was fiercely loyal to family members, and had a pretty good head on her shoulders. We were nearly the same person. "Dustie, what're you doing later?"

"I don't know. Why?"

"Wanna go out for ice cream or something?"

She shivered and glanced to the window behind us. A very light snow was falling but according to the weatherman, this storm was supposed to drop nearly eight inches overnight. "Isn't it a little cold for ice cream?"

Normally I would have laughed, but I was far too tired and stressed for that now. I just shrugged, dropping my eyes to the sticky imitation wood table we were circled around. Wayne had stayed dead silent throughout the entire meal, but that wasn't unusual. Oddly enough, the kid had gained a massive amount of popularity around school, probably just because of his cowboy status.

"How about coffee?"

I looked up and gave Dustie a short nod, eyes serious. Coffee it was.

Fairview had a total of two coffee joints; one that was a tiny building painted bright orange and purple that only made drinks to go, and another which was filled with an odd collection of tables and chairs and sofas with dark, mottled curtains placed strategically around. The interior was dim and it smelled perpetually of day-old coffee grounds and cow manure, being a favorite spot for the old farmers to sit around and drink one or six cups of black coffee in the mornings. I didn't mind, though, and met Dustie there after school.