Say You Won't Let Go

04

Alexa

WHEN Mrs. Carter, my best friends mom, showed up at our door step with a flustered look on her face and a envelope in hand I was completely taken by surprise. I haven't seen or spoken to her since the funeral and didn't expect to after that, considering that I was her dead daughter's best friend. So if she was here, it must've been important.

"Mrs. Carter, how are you? Would you like to come in?" I said uneasily after a few long seconds of me just staring at her in shock. Her hair was slightly disheveled and her eyes a little bloodshot as if she'd been crying before coming here.

"No thanks, dear," She responds, politely declining my invite. "I just wanted to give you this." She extends the envelope to me and my hand starts to shake as I recognize the loopy handwriting that belonged to my best friend.

"W-what is it?" I asked, my voice wavering.

"A letter, I believe. We found it in her room while going through some stuff. Had your name on it so I thought you should have it." She lets out a sigh and that's when I noticed how completely drained she looks. As if all the life has been sucked out of her and I guess in a way it has been.

"I should get going now. Take care, Alexa." She forces a small smile on her face as she walks down the driveway and to her car and when she drives out of my view I shut the door and quickly run upstairs, the envelope pressed to my chest.

There I was moments later, sitting down in the middle of my room with tears in my eyes, as I looked down at the envelope addressed to me with no idea of what the hell to do.

This was from her and it was addressed to me.

Was I curious about the contents in what ever was in this envelope? Yes, very much so.

But did I really want to know this very moment? I don't know.

That was the problem. I didn't know much of anything anymore. This envelope could hold the answers I was looking for as to why she did it. But as I continue to stare at the envelope, it starting to feel heavy in my hands, I couldn't bring myself to open it. At least not yet anyway.

I would have liked to think that part of the reason why was because I just wasn't ready. But I knew what was really keeping me from reading the contents of that envelope. It was the fear of what I would find.

So, as I wiped my eyes and put the envelope in a place where only I would be able to find it, I couldn't help but think that maybe, just maybe, all of this was my fault.

After an uneventful weekend, which I mostly spent worrying about what was in that letter, it was time to go back to school.

I showered, got dressed, put on a false smile, and kissed my parents goodbye as I headed out the door. It was the same routine every day.

The only difference that day was instead of going to my third hour Home Economics class, I went to poetry which was seemingly my new schedule due to our semester elective change. The desks in the classroom are set up in groups of four and I immediately gravitate towards the back.

"Alexa, thank God you're in this class." A familiar voice says with a breath of relief. I turn to be met with the greenish-blue eyes of Alison and Madison.

"I didn't know you guys liked poetry?" I say questioningly as the twins occupy the two seats facing me.

"We don't," they say in unison. "Our dad made us sign up for it. He says we need to have more appreciation for the finer pieces of literature, whatever that means." Alison finishes while rolling her eyes.

I suppress a chuckle at her obvious distaste for this class but that urge to giggle suddenly goes away as Blake Harper waltzes into the class and any urges to laugh quickly disappears as I suddenly start to feel self centered conscious.

Alison and Madison notice my change in mood and they both groan as they see what I'm looking at or more specifically, who I'm looking at.

"Hey, little sis. Other little sis." Blake says with a smirk as he pats the twins on their heads.

"Sis?" I ask, my brows furrowing in confusion. But that's when I notice it. They all have the same greenish-blue eyes and shiny black hair.

"Alexa, this thing right here," Madison pauses as she looks at Blake as if he's the worst thing she's ever laid eyes on. "Is our brother." No matter how disgusted she tries to look I can see the smile in her eyes.

"We're triplets. Unfortunately." Alison states and my eyes widen in shock.

"Triplets?"  I exclaim.

It puzzled me how I could have never noticed him before considering that I've cheered with the twins since freshman year but then again I didn't notice much of anything before everything happened.

And maybe if I had just paid more attention things wouldn't be the way they are now.

"I see why you wouldn't be able  to tell considering how much more better looking we are than him." Alison says jokes.

"That cut me deep, little sis." Blake feigns hurt as he presses his hand on his heart.

"Stop calling me little sis! You're only older by two minutes."

"Best two minutes of my life."

Before they can continue their banter a petite woman with blonde hair walks in and tells everyone to be seated.

Blake takes the last seat in our group next to me and as I decide to just ignore his existence for the remaining of this class hour.

My body goes completely rigid as he leans in and whispers, "This should be interesting, Alexa." He stretches out my name like a taunt and I instantly regret ever signing up for poetry.