Chapter 5 - Meltdowns

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Jesy's POV

It was the night before the funeral, that our parents death really hit the girls. They had asked for Mum and Dad at least twice a day which I had tried to calmly explain to them. But on Tuesday, 7 days since I had brought the girls home, when the girls finally broke. Everything in the past week had been fun, but when I started to explain the funeral, and talked about going back to school, getting back to normal, the real emotions that they had hidden came out. It was dinner time, when it all started.

Me: "Please eat your dinner, Olivia." I said firmly, she had sat silently, legs pulled up to her chest refusing to eat for the past 15 minutes and Eloise always wanting to copy her sister also hadn't touched her chicken dinner. She ignored refusing to answer my pleas. "Come on Olivia, don't be silly now," I said strictly pushing the plate closer to her.

Olivia blatantly disobeyed looking me in the eye, as she pushed the plate across the table. Eloise scared and anxious over her sisters behaviour began sucking her thumb fiercely rocking back and forth on the booster seat that I had bought to place on her chair realising that she wasn't yet tall enough to see over the table.

Me: "Eloise, please be careful darling," I said holding the chair down which was wobbling dangerously. "Ellie, angel, I can't hold you right now, please have something to eat, and then you can sit with me okay," I said responding to Eloise reaching out at me, not knowing how to respond to her sister's behaviour, although to be honest neither did I. I looked around the table to Leigh-Anne, looking for some help or advice. The shocked, confused look proved that she too were shocked at Livy's behaviour. 

Leigh-Anne had stayed most nights in the past week, with Perrie and Jade coming round from their shared apartment almost every day, knowing that I needed some adult time, some time to grieve on my own without having the girls, I tried to be strong in front of the girls, leaving them with Leigh if I needed to be on my own for a few minutes. 

Me: "Olivia, this is your last chance, eat your dinner." I said solidly, looking her in the eyes, pushing her plate towards her again. Again, ignoring my pleas, which even I couldn't argue sounded desperate, Olivia slid underneath the table, sitting sourly arms crossed. Shocking Eloise, as much as me, she rocked so hard, the chair flipped with her still strapped in. "Oh, Ellie sweetheart, you're okay, you're okay," Leigh and I both jumped up, lifting the chair back upright to reveal Eloise crying silently, reaching towards me for some comfort. "Olivia, come on now, don't be silly, get out from under the table and eat your dinner, like a good girl," I said reaching under the table to pull her out, passing Ellie to Leigh-Anne. 

Olivia: "Stop telling me what to do, you're not my Mummy, I hate you!" she screamed, coming out from under the table, running upstairs.

Leigh-Anne: "Jess, take a deep breath, she's just testing you," she said as we stood up looking at each other in shock.

Olivia's outburst only took Eloise's meltdown to another level, she was now hysterical, sobbing into Leigh's shoulder. She knew her sisters behaviour wasn't right, but she had copied her, turning to her for everything and now she just didn't know what to do. The poor girl was battling her own head, it was her big sister, she had always been there, protected her, shown her what to do, but she also knew that shouting wasn't right.

Me: "What do I do?" I asked desperate, taking Ellie from Leigh-Anne holding her close to my chest stroking her hair.

Leigh-Anne: "Umm, I don't know Jess, I don't know." she said shaking her head.

Me: "I need to go check on her," I said, I assumed that was the right thing to do, I stood up, looking at Eloise, who was clutching the neck of my t shirt tightly, thumb in her mouth. I couldn't bring her upstairs too, in case Olivia had another outburst.

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