Fat Girl ✔️

Part Three: Bella is Back

"I'm sorry we couldn't come and get you sooner, sweetheart. It was just such a big job."

"I get it, Mom," I said, brushing her off. I watched her glance down at my leg with a twinge of guilt and concern- something I rarely saw in her eyes anymore.

I headed for the front door, slinging my bag over my shoulder.

"Wait, Ellie," Mom said, chasing after me. She met me by the door. "What do you think about maybe, a family dinner tonight? I want to make it up to you. And... Dad's birthday is coming up. He would want..." 

She trailed off, not really knowing what to say. She had never been good at sharing her emotions, at least not as good as Dad, but I could tell she was really trying. It might have been the first time I'd seen her willingly open up since Dad died.

I smiled softly, pulling her into a quick embrace. "Sure, Mom. That sounds great. It would make Dad really happy."

She smiled, squeezing my arm. "Okay," She said, opening the front door for me. "You should get to school. Be careful on that Leg."

"I will."

Sydney waited for me in her car, a sour expression on her face. Bella sat in the backseat, not looking any happier. I cautiously made my way to the car.

"...Look, Sydney, I'm so sorry. You have to believe me about all of it," Bella said. They were already deep in conversation when I reached the car. Sydney hadn't been too happy about coming to pick Bella up, but I'd wanted as many opportunities to get them together as possible.

"You. And Shawn."

"I know."

"You were such a..."

"...A bitch?" She asked, raising an eyebrow. Sydney looked away.

"I'm sorry about all of it. Me and Shawn... I have no idea what I was thinking. I was so stupid for ever picking a guy over you guys. If I could take it back, I could. Can you forgive me?"

Sydney hesitated. She looked back at me. Then, looking through the rearview mirror at Bella, her gaze narrowed.

"As long as you're friends with Ellie, I guess we'll be hanging out. But as for forgiveness...I don't know yet."

Bella's face fell, but she nodded. "I get it."

I stared at the two of them, torn between what to do. I just wanted my two best friends back. I wanted what we had before. My mind drifted to the first day of senior year, to driving to school together and taking trips to the beach. It had always been the three of us. But now things were changing. A rift was forming between Sydney and Bella, one that I wasn't sure would mend.

Sydney had gotten back from Lake Tahoe a few days ago, but she was still hesitant on welcoming Bella back into our trio. No matter how many sleepovers or mall trips I scheduled, they just didn't seem to be getting along at all.

I latched my seatbelt on, sighing. "This should be fun."

***

There he was.

I wasn't sure how I would feel when I saw him again. Part of me was sure all of my feelings for him were gone. I'd assumed things would be easy, that I just had to finish out the rest of the year on a low-radar. But seeing him, face to face.. was hard.

Well, we weren't exactly face to face. I stared at the back of his head as I leaned my head on my hand in physics. He seemed to be doing fine. He sat next to Ingrid, and they engaged in full on conversation.

"He asked about you when you left. Before Fall Break started."

I turned, facing Sydney next to me. "What are you talking about?"

Sydney gave me a look that said, 'really?'. Glancing over at Blake, she opened up her textbook.

"He said he had to talk to you about something. You know, when I told him about the whole car accident thing, he actually seemed worried."

I still hadn't told Sydney about Julian, and I didn't want to. It wasn't my secret to tell, and it didn't feel right. And besides, telling Sydney about Blake would mean closure for me and him. And for some strange reason, I didn't want closure just yet. As much as I knew that what I had seen between Blake and Julian was real, I still couldn't help the small twinge I felt in my heart when I thought about Blake. Things were complicated, that was for sure. I bit my lip.

"He probably just felt guilty."

"After what he did? He should." She turned back to me, a disgusted look on her face. "You deserve so much better."

Did I? Blake was the only person I'd ever known to show interest in me. Was it bad that even after the video spread, I still wanted to be around him?

The bell for second period rang, and I said goodbye to Sydney as she raced to French class. Packing my bags, I heard someone approach in front of me. I lifted my head to find myself facing the one and only.

"So you're back."

"Yeah. I am."

"Do you think we could talk? When you get the chance?"

I stared back up at him in disbelief. He stood before me, his floppy brown hair in front of his eyes like always. Those eyes. They were manipulating. I wouldn't fall for them again, not this time.

I shook my head. "I don't think so."

Pushing past him, I left the classroom, the burn of his shoulder brushing against mine lingering on my skin.

***

"He and Ingrid have gotten close. Rumor has it she's either dating him or Julian."

I narrowed my eyes at Sydney as we sat in the cafeteria. She sat next to Bella, who seemed pleased to have Sydney sit by her.

"I told you I don't want to hear about him anymore."

Sydney raised her hands in surrender, mocking me. "You're the one that keeps staring."

"I'm not staring."

"You're definitely staring," Bella said, taking a sip out of her water-bottle. I turned back to Blake, where he talked with Julian, Ingrid on the other side of him.

What was his deal? I kept thinking of our kiss at the party. How none of it was real. I couldn't get Julian out of my head, their fight, the secret they held. Was he really seeing Ingrid? Or was Julian? He couldn't be. I needed answers. I was sick of secrets and lies and assumptions.

But what I needed the most was closure. If Blake was really... what I suspected he was, I needed to get him out of my head. There were other things, better things, to focus on, like my leg getting better, or reuniting my two best friends, or sweet farm boys only an hour away.

I watched as Blake stood up from his table, heading for the bathroom. I stood up.

"There's something I need to do," I said, leaving Bella and Sydney together at the table. "I'll be right back."

Without another word, I chased after Blake- something I thought I'd never do again.