Lavender Moon (Matty Healy Fanfic)

fallingforyou

It's been four days since the gig and also four days since I last spoke to Matty.
I've seen him in the hallways once or twice - it seemed that he was going to school quite frequently again - but I didn't have the guts to walk up to him. Nor did he make any efford in trying to talk to me. So you could say that it was all back to normal again.

"You have to come with us aswell!" my friend Amber suddenly jolted me out of my daydreams that might or might not involved Matty. I looked at her confused. Come where?
"Do you ever listen?" she complained and then repeated herself. They were planning on going to a house party hosted by some bloke called Brian tonight.
Amber talked incredible quick and I reduced myself on nodding whenever she paused for a second to take a breath.

//

I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be here.
I took another shot to soothe my nerves. I was sat next to a couple that was heavily making out on a couch.
Yes, I actually went to that goddamn party with Amber. Yes, she abandoned me as soon as we walked into the flat. Yes, I proceeded to get drunk. Yes, I was already regretting it.
The whole room was smoke clouded and fuggy. The air was burning in my lungs and so did the alcohol that I was pouring down my throat.
It wasn't the first time Amber took me to a party like this. She usually left me alone to hook up with some guy. What's the point in that actually? Taking your friend somewhere they don't even want to go if you don't plan on talking to them throughout the whole night?
The girl next to me was now on the guys lap and the whole making out turned into some dry humping thing and I grew even more uncomfortable.
I got up looking for a new destination and slowly pushed myself through dancing bodies on shaky legs.

"Where are ya headin' pretty girl?" I felt someones hand grab me around my upper arm causing me to turn around quickly.
A little to quick - the lights around me started dancing and I suddenly felt incredibly sick. The nauseous smell coming from the guy that was still holding me tight wasn't helpful either.
"Did ya hear me?"
I scanned him from head to toe. He was about an head taller than me, had a wierd haircut that somehow reminded me of a mullet and his mouth was drawn to a stupid grin. Everything about him just automatically made me want to punch him in the face.
"Leave me alone." I said calmly and managed to smile just as stupid as he did.
The following events happened so fast that I can't trace them back properly.
The guy - I later found out his name was Tony - twisted my arm and spat angry words in my direction and I kicked him in the shins.
Seemingly even though I wasn't firmly fixed at that point it still was enough to let go of me and bend over in pain.
I hasty moved away from him.

While I was trying to find the front door I bumped into Amber and some random guy. She looked at me mildly confused and blinked a few times.
"I want to go. Can we please go?" I whined. I felt miserable and still couldn't quite put together what just happened.
"No, I don't wanna go -" she slurred and I didn't understand the rest of her sentence. She was still in the arms of a foreigner that looked pretty amused.
"Please Amber" I tried once more.
"Why can't you have fun once? Why do you always have to be such a prude? Just let loose ... there are plenty of nice guys here ..." Her words were suprisingly clear. And they stung. They burned their way under my skin.
And I reacted how I usually acted when I got hurt: with anger.
"Fine!" I snapped and made my way to the now close door. I stepped out jumbling.
It was suprisingly bright outside. The moon seemed to be glowing that night immidiately soothing my mood.

It took me good fourty minutes to even find back to my street. I felt less tipsy and less pissed when I finally approached our driveway.
I stopped confused as I heard a whistle and looked around. Was I imagining things again? No.
My eyes caught someone oh so familiar sitting cooly on his roof. Even from the distance and in the sulky light I could see the smile that was plastered all over his face.
"Give me a second" he shouted over to me and disappeared through the roof window.
A little longer than a second later he actually opened the door. "Are you coming then?"
Matty.
Honestly - he confused me to the bits.
I didn't even notice that I was walking towards him until I entered his house following him up the stairs. I can't even tell you how I managed to get through the window and on the roof but it certainly didn't look smooth and I struggled not to fall down immidiately.
"Do you want-" Matty stopped mid-sentence still holding the pack of Camel Reds in my direction. "Nevermind, you don't smoke."
Ambers voice resonated in my head.
"Actually, yes." I answered. I mean what could happen anyway?
"Sure?" He actually looked concerned.
"Totally."
"Alright ..." Matty handed me a cigarette and offered me a light.
To say it was a horrible experience would probably be an understatement.
I was a houndred percent sure that I would throw up every single shot I drank a few hours ago while I was fighting for air probably making dying whale noises.
Matty quickly grabbed my arm to protect me from literally falling down the roofrop. It was the same spot the guy at the party had held me, yet it was feeling so different.
"Jesus, you could have told me this was your first time, I would have made sure that it isn't on a sodding roof." He breathed and held me even tighter.
It was funny how hard he tried to keep me from falling, yet I already was.

A/N: hello everyone! first of all, i'm sorry that it always seems to take me so long to update - i have million reasons but all of them are unimportant. also thank you for all the votes and lovely comments and reads in general, it really makes my day everytime. i'm on easter break now so i have three weeks without school and will probably / hopefully update soon xx