Lavender Moon (Matty Healy Fanfic)

bleed the same way

I wiped the tears from my eyes and nearly burned myself with the cigarette that was still between the fingers of my right hand. The coughing had stopped but my throat still felt like someone set it on fire. And this, my dearest Amber, is why I don't let loose.
"'lright, I'm taking this" Matty slowly took the cigarette away from me with his spare hand and flipped it off the roof. I felt miserabe. Right then even the last clouds moved away and the moon looked even brighter. I was sure the moon was mocking me.
"We should probably get somewhere you're not in acute danger to your life." he suggested already opening the window to climb back.
"Wait I'll hold you." Matty helped me get through the attic without me seriously hurting myself. He then jumped after in one quick motion. Poser. If I had five years to practice how to get through the window elegantly, I'd have no problem either. I wondered how many nights he had spend on there and why I had never thought of climbing through our roof window. Probably because I prefered to spend my nights in my cozy, warm bed rather than freezing myself to death or - well - accidentally killing myself because of one stupid movement on a slippy roof top.
"You're bleeding!" Matty exclaimed, jolting me out of my thoughts. I looked down on me confused. He quickly grabbed my right hand adjusting the cut on the palm. Oh.
It wasn't a deep cut for sure, I didn't even notice that I hurt myself or that there was blood dripping from my fingers. Oh.
My stomach dropped and I turned my head away. I rubbed my face a few times and tried to get rid off the nauseous feeling. Breathing in through my nose, breathing out through my mouth I calmed down a little.
"It's not a deep cut - the edges of the roof around the window are quite sharp. I'm sorry, I should have told you." He still had my hand in his while I inspected the photos on the wall closely. There were a lot of pictures of his mum in her younger years, she was quite a beautiful woman.
"I think we have a first aid kit downstairs, come."
I stumbled down the stairs following him into the massive kitchen. It was kept in creme colours with white furnishing. I was instantly afraid of ruining anything with my blood or my often uncoordinated behaviour.
Matty was rushing around and looking through drawers. I was standing awkwardly in the middle of the room and held my own hand to avoid dripping blood on the white rug.
Matty made a sound of triumph and turned back to me with a first aid box in his hands and swiftly pulled out the bandage.
I concentrated on his face while he was wrapping the bandage around me hand to distract myself. He looked highly focused, his forehead in deep wrinkles. His eyelashes were creating shadows beneath his eyes. It was simple things like that that fascinated me greatly.
"Done." Matty looked up to me. "Are you alright?"
I nodded. I really didn't know what was happening, I usually really didn't have a problem with blood or anything really but right then I felt the cold sweat on my forehead.
He quickly manoeuvred me to the closest sofa and made me sit down. Who on earth has a sofa in their kitchen?
Matty then went to get me a glass of water. I closed my eyes and realized just how tired I actually was. What was I even doing in Mattys house in the middle of the night?
He handed me the glass and sat down on the other side of the sofa resting his head on his arm. We sat there for ages in silence.
"Tell me something about yourself." He suddenly said.
"What?" I felt dumbstruck.
"Anything, something interesting preferably." There was the half-smile again.
"You know a lot about me, probably more than most people at our school do." I tried to bluff it out. He just waited patiently. "Fine, so ... oh god I really don't know, I'm not an interesting person."
"Just tell me something you've never told anyone before."
"I might had a few but I'm certainly not revealing my darkest secrets to you just because you bandaged me." I snapped indignant.
"I'm not asking for your secrets, really, I don't want to know about the goldfish you forgot to feed when you were six. Just something that's so random that you never even thought about telling anyone." That goddamn half-smile just wouldn't leave his goddamn face.
I rubbed my left eye while thinking. "Uhm, well I go into CD stores, sort the albums and leave. I think they could start paying me for that, I mean I probably sorted more CDs and LPs than anyone in the store ever did. It just drives me crazy when I see a Green Day album in the Amy Winehouse section. I mean is it really that hard to put it back to the right section."
The half-smile turned into a proper smile exposing his teeth.

A/N: I need to stop cutting off chapters in the middle oh god. Thank you for 100 votes you guys are amazing xx