cherished affliction

Wanting More

A woman stood at a window. She watched the birds dip in and out of the corners of the skyscrapers, she looked down onto the street and allowed the freckles of her pupils to trace over the yellow of the taxi's and the heads of the business men and women that bustled throughout the sidewalks probably fretting over things that were trivial, rushing to get home, rushing to get to their second or third job.

She watched, she took in every moment, and she savored it.

These were the simple things that her colleagues probably didn't take the time out to appreciate. Too busy idolizing her for being successful, fearing her for being in control, or envying her for being rich. She, however, felt compelled to focus on these little things. Because standing at a window, calmly taking in life and accepting all things good and bad about it, was a part of who she was as a successful woman.

Despite the royalty that was seeping from the Jauregui name, Lauren was so very different from them.

She still stood in a stance that displayed superiority and leadership. She managed to finish college and graduate school, gaining her MBA in business by the time she was twenty-three. She excelled by working for two different companies over the course of four years before even stepping foot into her family's business, despite the belief that her position was just handed to her fresh out of college.

Lauren Jauregui was special, wildly intelligent and along with everything else in her life, very dominant when it came to being successful.

She was "tailor-made to be a leader" her mother used to say.

In every aspect of her life.

One aspect, more than anything. Because as fun as it was to run a billion dollar jewelry company, it was even more satisfying to see a beautiful woman on her knees, head down, arms behind her back...waiting for instructions.

It was who she was.

The sounds of obedience, of a woman who could and would submit to her when asked. It was everything.

It made Lauren Jauregui every bit of the wonder that she had become and despite the feeling of being unbalanced sometimes, the rush from the lifestyle altering her emotionally, she lived for it.

Lauren closed her eyes and took a deep breath, suddenly becoming a little lightheaded at the mere thought of it. Flexing her slim fingers she lifted herself up on the balls of her feet and opened her eyes to the sight of the darkening skies of New York City.

Had she really been standing there that long?

It must have been a particularly slow day for her, because she hadn't even noticed the amount of time that passed her by in the midst of her silent musings.

Reaching a careful hand to the glass, she allowed the tips of her manicured fingers to slide softly against it.

A beep suddenly sounded and as the voice of her secretary came through the speaker, Lauren drew her hand back from the window at almost as quickly as she had touched it.

"Ms. Jauregui? I'm sorry to interrupt your meditation, but it's five-thirty. You have a guest for dinner this evening at the restaurant you requested downtown. I made reservations for seven, and your car is waiting for you downstairs. Is there anything else I can get for you?"

Lauren Jauregui smiled.

"No, that will be all Renee' thank you."

"Have a good evening Ms. Jauregui ," the woman spoke genuinely and Lauren pushed her bangs away from her brow.

She made sure to always be the last person leaving her building, a routine that insured that she was putting in as much work as she could and not just sitting back allowing faces without names run her company all by themselves. Every night, she would finish up all of the loose ends that she could, meditate and dismiss Renee before locking up and heading home to indulge...whatever she so desired.