Groupchat (t.s&j.b)

4.

Jester Jed: GUYS RUTH ASKED ME TO GET LADY PRODUCTS FOR HER BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO GET?!

King Jay: Cotton dildos

Princess Troye: just dildos in general

Jester Jed: I asked the wrong group of people.

Peasant Adam: we basically know nothing about vaginas

Queen Hari: hey!

Peasant Adam: Oh sorry, Hari's a vagina expert. She has her fingers up a new one every day.

Jester Jed: Oh my god  

Peasant Adam: Hari... you ever been with a girl on her period?

Queen Hari: okay no that's gross

Princess Troye: I swear people only do that in satanic rituals

King Jay: it'd look like a small animal died

Queen Hari: speaking of satanic rituals

Queen Hari: Let's all sacrifice ourselves to Satan, we're going to hell anyway

Princess Troye: better yet, let's overthrow Satan and have a huge gay party

Queen Hari: I'M IN 

Queen Hari: WHO'S WITH ME??

King Jay: let's not forget Jo, she keeps asking to be sacrificed to Satan

Queen Hari: we'll take her with us

Jester Jed: I know nothing about periods HELP ME!

Jester Jed: do I get heavy pads or light??

King Jay: well Ruth's only about 8 stone so light 

Queen Hari: JACOB

King Jay: what?

Queen Hari: IT MEANS FLOW 

King Jay: ???

Queen Hari: BLOOD FLOW 

Princess Troye: i'm trying to eat my breakfast

Princess Troye: my baked beans look like blood

Queen Hari: PERIOD BLOOD

Queen Hari: TROYE THAT'S DISGUSTING YOU KINKY BOI 

Princess Ruth: JED I'M FED UP OF YOUR BULL GET ME SOME FUCKING HEAVY PADS AND A BOTTLE OF FUCKING WHISKY 

Princess Ruth: YOU ALL ARE ACTING LIKE THIS IS SOME JOKE. IT'S NOT. DO YOU WANT TO FEEL LIKE SOMEONE'S DRILLING YOUR UTERUS???

Princess Troye: is she on her period or something?

***

HOLA I'M SORRY I DIDN'T UPDATE I'VE BEEN ON HOLIDAY WHOOOOOO 

Okay I love you all so much please do enjoy this chapter, thank you for all the love 💙 X