Troye: Did you know that monkeys are associated with Satan
Jacob: I... did not
Troye: Hm apparently they're horny animals
Jacob: May I ask where this fascinating information is coming from?
Troye: Shakespeare
Troye: I think
Troye: But is hell gonna basically be gays, monkeys and Trump?
Jacob: ....
Jacob: Unfortunately I cannot answer from experience
Troye: BUT DOES THAT MEAN SEXUALLY ACTIVE PEOPLE GO TO HELL?
Jacob: It's from Othello right? Goats and monkeys? Two sexually active animals associated with hell
Troye: Oh my god you're a literature nerd
Troye: So does that mean excessive babymakers go to hell?
Jacob: But aren't they like doing their duty to procreate??
Troye: EXACTLY
Jacob: And the no condom thing means they let all dat life happen which is meant to get you in the good books?
Troye: Mind blown
Troye: Chris Evans is hot
Jacob: .... That's a topic change
Troye: I was just thinking how hot our babies would be
Troye: But he's too old :(
Jacob: And that's the only thing stopping you from having babies?
Troye: Yeah?
Troye: Oh
Troye: Wait
Troye: Science needs to hurry up so we can have babies
Jacob: We?
Troye: Me and Tom Holland. Obviously.
Jacob: Obviously.
Troye: Have you watched Infinity Wars?
Jacob: NO!
Jacob: DO NOT SAY ANYTHING I SWEAR TROYE
Jacob: I WILL SLAP YOU
Troye: I'm shocked you've managed to avoid spoilers for so long jeez
Troye: Don't worry I won't tell you who dies
Troye: MAYBE NO-ONE DIES
Troye: MAYBE EVERYONE DIES
Jacob: STOP I WILL BLOCK YOUR ASS
Troye: My ass is hot
Troye:
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Jacob: Where?
Troye: ???
Jacob: I don't see no ass
Troye: I-
Jacob: Oh is it that flat pancake thing??
Troye: ADJGHFSKL
Troye: EXCUSE YOU
Jacob:
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Jacob: Check this bad boy out
Troye: Lmao honey have you ever even heard the word ass before?
Jacob: Says you Sivan. Thicc?? Only thing that's thicc is the lenses of the glasses you so obviously need.
Jacob: Should've gone to Specsavers
Troye: Honey the only ass you've ever seen is a mule
Troye: I'm thicc af compared to you 😘
Jacob: Thicc? Babe did you see an ass on TV and think it was a mirror?
Troye: ...
Troye: Loki dies
You blocked Troye Sivan
DM from Hari Nef
Hari: Honey what was the domestic?
Jacob: What?
Hari: Why you blocking your husband?
Hari: I think we should all sit down and have a nice calm discussion
Jacob: He spoiled infinity wars
Hari: HE DID WHAT
Hari: IMA STRANGLE THE LIL BLONDE BIH
Jacob: He also wants to make babies with Tom Holland
Hari: Doesn't everyone??
Jacob: ... no?
Hari: I'm blocking you fake ass hoe
Jacob: ONLY COZ I'D RATHER MAKE BABIES WITH TROYE
Hari: Oh... my god
Hari: That is the creepiest cutest shit
Hari: Wait wait
Jacob: Waiting
Hari:
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Jacob: Oh my god
Jacob: if my child with Troye looks like THAT I gotta start babymaking ASAP
Jacob: He got his papa's model genes
Hari: Yeah true he does look alot like Troye..
Jacob: you're hilarious
Hari: I appreciate the ego boost
Hari: NOW GO UNBLOCK YOUR HUSBAND AND START MAKING THOSE BABIES
***
This is literally just one big crack ficisn't it?😂🤦🏻♀️ Anyways I'vebeen away for like a few months because a levels but I'm back just in time for uni so watch me disappear again 😂😂 Love to y'all that stick with me -L x
