Arielle's pov
Being married comes with a lot of ups and down, compromises and moments when you just want to throw in the towel and call it quits. As much as I hated our struggling days ,I sometimes wish we could go back so I can do the simplest things with Carter, eating dinner together, grocery shopping ,I'm not a ball player but that's what he loves to do so I tagged along. Even after we finished with our degrees ,we still were close and I didn't feel alone. His career revolves around phone calls ,answering emails and negotiating. My job isn't easy but I have more flexible and decent hours. Josiah only stays with his grandma for an hour though they want it to be longer. This passed year has been they most difficult year our relationship! Carter has been all about work ,work ,work! My birthday and now our anniversary.
I'll give him a little credit I did get my favorite chocolates and our living room is filled with long stem roses. Beautiful and I'm grateful for them but I would've also loved to spend this day with Carter. I told him two weeks ago to take this day off since it's on a Friday and enjoy the weekend together. He agreed and said he planned something special, I actually got excited for a spelt second. Then remembered this is the same man ,who hasn't been keeping his word lately. I knew he would be home late before he sent his normal text 'Sorry babe I'll be late! I love you'. I tried to put cheating to the back of my mind for this longest time. He's never cheated in the eleven years we've been together so I'm trying to have faith in my husband but he's making it damn hard.
Watching reruns of law and order ,I hear the door open. He comes in at the same time every single night. Not a minute before or after. As much as I want to be all over my man when he comes in, I just can't. "Hey beautiful." I can't tell if he's tired from work or cheating. "Hey." Walking towards me for kiss and he's quickly denied. Ninth anniversary ,no show and his black ass expects to get a kiss? Shit. Nope! I can see a little disappointment in his face, "I fucked up big time. I'm sorry. No one was willingly-"
"I don't care about any negotiations. I cared about spending my anniversary with my husband but obviously you had something way more important to attend." I say, Carter knows me well enough to know when I've reached my limits. "You're not here physically hell you're barely mentally. You've never missed any family outings even it if was just to the fucking park, first time since we've been together you missed my birthday." We've been together since I was seventeen and he was nineteen. He has always been the first to wish me happy birthday never missed a year. "This year has been busy for our company Ari. My income goes to our home, takes care of us."Carter explains while taking off his tie.I have to sit up to talk my shit now.
"One we aren't living like we were ten years ago, two we don't spend money on ridiculous shit. You and I know our accounts are damn pretty without overtime so those long hours you work can be cut back Carter."I say, "I don't like this Carter."
Shaking his head, "I'm trying here Arielle. Give me some credit! I try my best to make it home to spend time with you and be with Siah." I'll never discredit him as a father. He's never missed anything of Josiah's, first one there ,last on to leave. He's only missed a practice but Josiah didn't make a big deal out of it so neither will I. "You're a great dad but lately you haven't been the husband ,I'm use to. I miss my best friend. I thank god for giving me a husband ,who provides for his family and works extremely hard. I just don't feel like I'm living with the man I love anymore." I've never considered moving out until now. Working in us in separate house holds will be good. Possibly.
"Where are you going with this Ari?"Carter isn't a stupid man. "I can admit I've been slacking these past months but you know the man I am today is because of you and our son." Carter did sell for a awhile when things were tight. Stopped when I found I was pregnant with Siah and has never went back. Seeing so many of his friends lose their life's to the streets ,knowing they have kids was even worse. Something had to give. "Maybe living separately will be a reminder of why we're together." I say. The look on his face is breaking my heart.
"What is the suppose to do? We can work through this in the same household."Taking a hold of my hand, "It's not for good. Just until we get us back on track."
••
"Will I still see you?" I hear Josiah ask Carter. It's been two weeks since our talk and we are moving out. My sister owns her townhouse so we're staying there until Carter and I get it together. "Of course! Every morning I'll take you to school and pick you up. I know this isn't what you want for me and mommy, trust me when I say I don't want this either. But I promise you this isn't permanent. I need you to do me a favor though." Seeing Josiah smile because of his dad always brings joy to my heart. "I need you to continue to be a good kid! Listen to mommy, clean up when she tells you to ,help her out without her having to ask you. Can you do that big boy?" Siah immediately nods,"Yeah I can."
"My man!"He brings Siah in for a hug,"I love you so much baby."
"I love you too dad."
Carter closes Josiah's door,"Call me when you get there." I hate this just as much as him. The last thing I want to do is move into my sisters place when I have a home. But the way our relationship is going isn't good and it needs to be fixed before it's unfixable. "I will." Wrapping his arms around me,"This won't be long. I'll do anything to make sure you two are home ,where you're suppose to be." I miss laying close beside him or in his arms while he finishes his work. The are just the little things I miss. "I love you two more then anything in this world Ari and I will get you two back home." He's always been a forehead kissed. "I know ,I love you too."
