Breathe You In

chapter 4

"No, I can sit on the floor alpha..' Sam stuttered as Dean showed him the couch.

"No. You can sit here," Dean told him," and please, call me Dean."

"But it's not my place."

"Well here you are free from all those rules okay."

"Okay." Sam finally relented and sat down on the couch. It was softer than anything he'd ever sat on. He shifted to get comfortable but groaned at the pain in his ribs.

"Can I check that?" The alpha asked him. Sam shook his head no. Dean nodded and stood. "I'll get you some pain killers, ice, and hot cocoa."

"Cocoa?" Sam asked questioningly. 

"Yeah. Hot chocolate?" Dean says. "Don't tell me you've never had it..."

Sam nodded,"Never was given it....."

"Damn....." Dean says. "Well you'll love it okay. Trust me."

Sam just nodded again and looked at the floor. Then Dean handed him a blanket. Sam took it and wrapped it around himself and inhaled its scent, freshly cleaned and smelling of Dean. He watched Dean walk out and into what he guessed was the kitchen. He heard dishes clanking and then Dean walked out again. "I got the milk to boil, now I'm gonna go out and get the groceries from my car. I'll be right back."

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Dean walked out into the cold and down to his car. The snow was already falling fast and hard. He was glad he went food shopping when he did. Opening the trunk he fished out the plastic bags and looped them over his arms, he had at least 12 bags, as he shut and locked the trunk.  He walked back inside. He found Sam fast asleep on the couch. He smiled and started putting the groceries away and turned on his cd player putting the volume on low.  His mix tape of his favorite songs began to play.

Carry on my wayward son
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more

Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond the illusion
I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high
Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think I still was a mad man
I hear the voices when I'm dreamin', I can hear them say

Carry on my wayward son
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more

Masquerading as a man with a reason
My charade is the event of the season
And if I claim to be a wise man, it surely means that I don't know
On a stormy sea of moving emotion
Tossed about I'm like a ship on the ocean
I set a course for winds of fortune, but I hear the voices say

Carry on my wayward son
For there'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no moreCarry on, you will always remember
Carry on, nothing equals the splendor
Now your life's no longer empty
Surely heaven waits for you

As he made two mugs of hot cocoa, he hummed along with the song. He added whipped cream to the top of the drinks and then walked out and put them down on the coffee table and gently shook Sam awake. Sam started awake and gave Dean a warning growl.

"Sorry...." Dean said softly. Then motioned to the mug and handed it to Sam. "Careful, it's hot.." he warned.

Sam nodded and blew on the cup and sat back on the couch. "Thanks...."

"Welcome, so we are gonna go to the hospital to get that checked out tomorrow....." 

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"I-I I hate hospitals...." Sam mumbled as flashbacks flew through his mind. Pain, a baby's cry, then silence, empty silence. He'd lost so much in hospitals...... He didn't realize he was shaking until Dean took the mug from his hands and placed it on the table.

"Whoa. Whoa. Whoa, you okay... whats wrong?" Dean asks.

"I-I-" Sam felt the tears form as he was reliving the past. Glimpses flashing before his eyes. "I lost them-my fault-both of them gone-I don't know what happened- they were perfect both of them-I-" Sam choked on a sob and put his face in his hand, "It was my fault."

"Easy it wasn't your fault.....things like this happen sometimes...." 

"No... can't do it again." Sam put a hand over his belly. "Never again."

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TO BE CONTINUED