Souled [Editing]

Chapter 23

Meredith sat at the kitchen and fidgeted with her phone. It had died during the drive and it was useless to her right now. Still, she stared at the dark screen and wondered if anyone had tried to call. Part of her didn't care if anyone did and then another part did. Regardless, she wasn't sure where her charger was so she wasn't going to spend too much time thinking about it anymore. There was too many years to catch up on with her dad to think about anything else for the time being.

John bustled around the kitchen, searching for him and Meredith something to drink. They had agreed to settle in for a long conversation, without actually verbally saying so, and those types of conversations always required something to drink. He pulled the iced tea out of the refrigerator and poured two glasses. He set on in front of Meredith and settled down into his seat. After a long sip, he started talking again.

"I'm sorry," he said. His voice was gravelly as ever, but it seemed that it was even more so since his vocal chords were not used to being used.

"For what?" Meredith asked, cocking her head.

"I'm sorry for the past few years. I'm sorry for practically abandoning you after your mother died. I'm sorry I let the grief overtake me so much I stopped talking to you...to everyone."

"Oh, Dad." Meredith reached across the table and placed her hand on top of his. "It's okay."

"It's not okay. While your mother was the love of my life, is," he said reverently, "I shouldn't have let my emotions control me like they did. When she died," he struggled to say the word, "it took a part of me with her. And even though it hurt as if losing half of myself, I shouldn't have left you alone in your grief."

"Losing her felt like losing myself, too." She tightened her hold on John's hand.

"I have failed you, Meredith."

"No you haven't."

John reached across the table and brushed the hair out of Meredith's face. "Yes I did. I left you in your time of need to selfishly allow myself to deal with my own pain alone. The wounds caused by her death weren't healed properly. For either of us. I noticed that you were still struggling when you didn't come back from college outside of holidays or called."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to leave you alone when I went off to college. School was so far away from you which made it hard to visit frequently. I did always think about you though. I know I didn't ever say it, but I did."

"That makes me feel a little better."

"I love you, Dad. You know that right?"

John's eyes lit up and they almost seemed to shine more than usual. "I do. I love you more than there are stars in the sky." He patted her hand and took a deep breath. "Are you ready to tell me why you came here?"

Meredith's eyebrows knitted together. "We don't have to talk about that."

"If you need to talk, I'm here for you. After all, you haven't really told me anything about your One."

Meredith's stomach seized. She didn't really want to talk about either topics, but she was dying to tell someone what happened. So she did. She proceeded to tell him everything. How she met Nate, the rocky beginning relationship, the trip to Dee's graduation, all the way to the bitter present. Talking about it hurt but it helped, too.

"Mere, sweetheart," John said. "I'm so sorry to hear things went sour. But it's not like this is irreparable."

Meredith was busy wiping tears away and when he spoke, she paused. "What do you mean?"